darkness.
darkness.
echoing darkness.
darkness.
darkness.

"youre just fat jessica. youre fat now, youve always been fat, youre always going to be fat and there is nothing you can do about it so dont try. you suck. youre stupid. youre a cat-killer ( Read more... )

"maybe you're right. maybe we are meant to be together."

maybe this time she'll let herself try. but i cant hold my breath about it. i don't know how much more disappointment i can survive.

im not so sure if i care or not. i dont think anyone cares. they say they love me. but i dont know how to believe it. my phone rarely rings. usually its aaron. i cant take a collect call. i dont even think i want to. the only other time it seems to ring is when a bill collector calls. i dont have any freaking money. and so i turn to the only thing ( Read more... )

Holy crap. My life is really some piece of shit. I'm not just a sick, struggling college student, but I am also a pathetic loser. I'm so sick of myself. I really do hate it. Everything. I hate the information age too. I have to be cryptic in my freaking journal. whatevs.

i try to hide the way i feel. about everything. especially living. i just cannot seem to figure out how or why to be happy i survived 2 fatal overdoses. its wrong. its unnatural. and after seeing what i saw, feeling what i felt when i briefly crossed over, happiness doesn't even exist in this world. people say its selfish that i want to go. i think ( Read more... )

January 9, 2014 ( Read more... )

oh my girl, infinite your woes ( Read more... )

oh the deep penetrating pain that betrayal brings. hurting this bad cant be real. its a searing, burning wound that is terrible to even imagine, and yet so prevalent in my life. i wish i couldn't feel so much. i feel pain deep in my soul. there is no numbing it. it wears me down, it bleeds, it engulfs everything in my world until i can hardly ( Read more... )

please god ( Read more... )