Reuben June Rainey

[jewel62689]

A girl i met not to long ago will be remembering her sons birthday. he was born when she was 4 months pregnant. He is a beautiful little baby. tomarrow will be really hard for me too becuase i cant imagine anyone else ever having to go through the pain i did when i lost Adrian and Julian, you sit there crying forever never thinking it will end

Comments

[jewel62689]

yeah its a sad thing to have in common but its also glad to know your not alone. many people have people close to them die but nothing is like losing a child. Reuben has brought me so much courage. becuase through you and him i think very soon ill finally be able to get Drs notes and look at the pictures and finally start to accept what happened whereas i would have not been able to without you both. i love reuben just as i love my own. ( i hope it doesent offend you by me saying that) i told michael that once and he said how could i love someone ive never met but then agian....i never held my own children and i love them. im sure somewhere they are all safe. That is for sure. Il give bug ( tristan) hugs for you and hope soon youll have one of your own. you know, i stopped writing letters a long time ago but always wanted to keep doing it becuase it lets me say things i cant really say to other people. mom always said it was crazy to do it becuase that means i havent gotten over thier death and think that they somehow get the message,

[jewel62689]

yeah when i got home i just laid in bed and started writing to them. i have everything in a folder i never thought to get a book but i think im gonna do that. its just here lately its been wieghing me down ans sadly enough, michael wasnt there for the birth and i didnt like him going to the DRs office becuasei figured the less he knew the less it would hurt him in the end and hes sad for me and i know he misses what could have been but ive only seen him cry twice and i mean anytime i want to cry to him hes there its just i feel like sometimes im the only person who misses them. hes seen the pictures and he sais theyre not much to see but i need to see them for myself. sometimes i wonder what they would have grown up to look like. you know. becuase bug looks so much like michael all he has is my nose :P i was gonna ask.....when you have another kid....how do you plan on telling your kid about Reuben?