so livejournal...blah blah blah whine blah...

ya im the girl people gossip about because of addiction? haha, why not ugliest clothes haha...that just is funny.

dear mom, dear dad, my childhood is dying and i cant resusitate her. i dont want this body. these issues. these fights. these words. its weird all the things i want and how they have changed over time. you know that commercial that deals with the cartoon wife saying, "what do you want to weigh nothing?" to her husband losing weight. i thought yes. ( Read more... )

raleigh harris is a lot of everything. a lot my best friend and a lot of a kid with problems, just like me. we talk about each thing in a different but incredulously in depth. the depth of a star or a lover's eye ( Read more... )

im crying my eyes out again..i called rachel and i couldnt even talk. i told wesley i proved myself that i wasnt worth it. hes not mine anymore. he doesnt deserve this. he doesnt deserve any of this. i wish he would find someone real ( Read more... )

i cant stop looking at all the pictures molly took of me on new years. how can that be me? i look like i have confidence flowing out through my eyes. people actually like these pictures, but anyways there are more important things going on. we all have an eternity from another break from school. my stomach hurts just thinking about going to that ( Read more... )

oh dear, the little cat in my room is my new best friend. he lays on me like wesley could if he was a tiny striped ball. on the way home from my uncles where we received him, he did not stop meowing. i wouldnt have been surprised if my mom hated him, but i find her intwined in his face like i am. she says i can keep him if i eat ( Read more... )

how is the most looked forward to holiday of the year in just a few days..and in just a few days it will be over too. i mostly need all the money, but the clothes will be very fancy. i dont want any cookies, god ( Read more... )

mmm I had a great day. Pretty much two weeks with no school, hot damn. My mom has been constantly on me about eating and clinical sadness, but no one can help that. I wish they would stop telling me how special I am. Who could say that to a shaking little girl and go home feeling half alright? Whatever, no sympathy. They commanded that I have a ( Read more... )

they meaning my mother and nancy lott. im free, but not. ill never be free again pretty much. in weeks, everything has come down around me. actually days. that tuesday was the first day i didnt run and spoke to nancy. now im clinically depressed, anorexic, and have severe anxiety. GREAT. am i cool now? is that how the bell sounds freedom? i can't ( Read more... )