你蛋疼不 - Chapter 6
Title: 你蛋疼不
Authors: atmest and daeseol
Genre: Crack, Romance, Fluff, AU
Focus Pairings: Sehun/Luhan, Suho/D.O.
Side Pairings: Baekhyun/Chanyeol, Kris/Tao, Chen/Xiumin, Kai/Lay, Kai/D.O.
Chapter Focus: Suho/D.O., Kai/Lay, Chen/Xiumin
Rating: PG-13
Summary: EXO in an alternative reality wherein they are students in the Philippines and they all go to the Big 4.
Note: Glossary still not updated (duh is this even new).
( previous chapter )
Isang araw, our character Kyungsoo is staying in his condo unit because he has to finish his paper as soon as he can because the deadline is coming near. A submitted research paper means vacation, and vacation means free life, and free like means possible multiple dates with Gwapo Tibak Leader. He may be over the "Sex" date na, but he still can't forget how warm and kilig he was whenever Junmyeon would throw an arm around Kyungsoo's shoulder the last time they met sa Casaa, pulling Kyungsoo closer so he can smell the very manly perfume Junmyeon wears.
"His hands are so soft," Kyungsoo mumbles, reminding himself of when Junmyeon took his hand when they went to the UPD Main Library and Kyungsoo was basically confused and lost inside so Junmyeon had to guide him to the section he had to go to. He sighs. He can't wait for another fluffy "date" with Junmyeon, but then he has to finish this paper muna before he can go out again. Man, this is horrible. He's not even halfway his research, and he is extremely mentally tired na. Frustrated, he goes online to take a break and Tweet his stress out.
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
this is so difficult i want this to end na
suho @kuyajunmyeon
@kyungkyungdo aaw /hugs
Well, Kyungsoo isn't entirely sure who @kuyajunmyeon is when he first sees the username but he freaks out right after he realizes it must be Junmyeon the Gwapo Tibak Leader.
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
@kuyajunmyeon is this... junmyeon?
suho @kuyajunmyeon
@kyungkyungdo hihi yes. your username is as cute as the owner of the account
suho @kuyajunmyeon
@kyungkyungdo also sorry if i didn't tell you na i follow you na pala.
Kyungsoo gasps loudly, a hand over his mouth, in surprise. How long has Junmyeon been following him on Twitter?
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
@kuyajunmyeon lol omg it's okay! wait imma follow back. and aaah i am not cute! >O<
yixing @ikawnimais
@kuyajunmyeon @kyungkyungdo of course he wouldn't mind ;D
It's not really okay because, in all honesty, he is internally panicking. Did he tweet about how gwapo Junmyeon is na ba? Or how he was slightly disappointed about the "Sex" date? Or how he thinks he is perfect for Gwapo Tibak Leader? Breathe in, breathe out. He manages to calm down before he realizes he hasn't tweeted anything about it (yet). Besides he doesn't tweet a lot. He doesn't even have an icon and a header to begin with.
suho @kuyajunmyeon
@kyungkyungdo you are! and oh how's your research going na? if... you don't mind me asking
@kuyajunmyeon uh... bad? i don't really know how to do this RRL :(
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
excuse me pls gtfo RT @ikawnimais: @kuyajunmyeon @kyungkyungdo of course he wouldn't mind ;D
suho @kuyajunmyeon
@kyungkyungdo aaaw /hugs you again. do you want me to help you? i can offer my servces. for free hihi
suho @kuyajunmyeon
@kyungkyungdo also who is @/ikawnimais?
yixing @ikawnimais
WOW
yixing @ikawnimais
wow i am unknown to junmyeon
yixing @ikawnimais
ouch may slash pa sa mention ;O;
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
@kuyajunmyeon omg... services? *O* and... you will help me? like talaga? also @ikawnimais is yixing ^^
yixing @ikawnimais
@kyungkyungdo @kuyajunmyeon heychu
yixing @ikawnimais
@kyungkyungdo @kuyajunmyeon both of you
yixing @ikawnimais
services. i like that. can i avail?
yixing @ikawnimais
@kyungkyungdo @kuyajunmyeon are you guys gonna have sex
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
@ikawnimais OMG YIXING ANO BA >///< @kuyajunmyeon
yixing @ikawnimais
@kyungkyungdo i MEAN SEX SINANGAG EXPRESS why are you so green? diba you can ask him out for another sex date naman @kuyajunmyeon?
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
omg
suho @kuyajunmyeon
@kyungkyungdo if you want? before we do your RRL :") my treat ulit @ikawnimais
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
YIXING!!!!!
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
@kuyajunmyeon hahaha nakakahiya naman lagi nalang ako nililibre mo ><
yixing @ikawnimais
arte tsss
suho @kuyajunmyeon
@kyungkyungdo haha. it's okay. i like your company naman saka i'm gonna help you with the RRL :)
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
@kuyajunmyeon >///< thank you talaga.
suho @kuyajunmyeon
@kyungkyungdo haha you're so cute. i can imagine you doing that.
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
@kuyajunmyeon excuse me mister gwapo i am not cute >///<
suho @kuyajunmyeon
@kyungkyungdo ay gwapo ba ako para sayo?
yixing @ikawnimais
is this what i think it is
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
@kuyajunmyeon nakakainis ka!
suho @kuyajunmyeon
@kyungkyungdo you didn't answer my question naman
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
@kuyajunmyeon eeeeh. uh, y-yes?
yixing @ikawnimais
hala sige harot pa kayong dalawa
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
@ikawnimais wag kang inggitero go find your own jugjuger okay
suho @kuyajunmyeon
@kyungkyungdo ahahaha! omg you really are so cute!
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
@kuyajunmyeon aaaah stop >///< will text you na nga lang haha and will go back to research na rin.
suho @kuyajunmyeon
@kyungkyungdo lol alright cutesoo! :")
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
@kuyajunmyeon aaaah ano ba >///< haha. got my phone na.
yixing @ikawnimais
sighs will he be online na ba
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
=____________=
yixing @ikawnimais
oh my god
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
mas may action pa love life ni tibak leader kesa sakin
yixing @ikawnimais
@kailibugan hi jongin! aaw don't worry it's okay! it will come soon ;">
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
who is @/ikawnimais
yixing @ikawnimais
OMG IKAW RIN
yixing @ikawnimais
IS THIS A UP THING
yixing @ikawnimais
T____T @kailibugan this is yixing T____T
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@ikawnimais yixing! omg the cute guy from UST right? wait will follow back.
yixing @ikawnimais
@kailibugan omg i am not really cute but... thank you? :") anyway how's your nazareno? too bad didn't get to see it.
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@ikawnimais ito, itim pa rin. haha. pero ayos lang. the audience liked it! :)
yixing @ikawnimais
@kailibugan seeing the itim na nazareno? :"> i wish i could see it, too!
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@ikawnimais i could let you :">
yixing @ikawnimais
oh my god
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@ikawnimais we have a rerun of the show next week, i can give you a ticket for free :)
yixing @ikawnimais
oh. ;o;
yixing @ikawnimais
@kailibugan sure sure! i'll definitely find time to see your itim na nazareno ;">
yixing @ikawnimais
@kailibugan i like your username btw. ^o^
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@ikawnimais hahaha yey! also. thank you! i like my username, too. ;)
yixing @ikawnimais
@kailibugan haha i also like the owner of the username haha jk!!
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@ikawnimais haha swabe ka rin ano. i like it. ;D
yixing @ikawnimais
EEEEEEEH
yixing @ikawnimais
@kailibugan hindi naman *winks back*
yixing @ikawnimais
@kailibugan uhm jongin?
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@ikawnimais yes?
yixing @ikawnimais
@kailibugan i was wondering if you're free sana this... uhm, weekend? sunday?
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@ikawnimais hmmm i think i'm free ng afternoon. why though?
yixing @ikawnimais
@kailibugan oh
yixing @ikawnimais
@kailibugan yey! is it okay if you wanna hang out? like uh sex tayo or smth?
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
aaaw may gagawin lang daw siya saglit. well, i can wait naman :"> hihi.
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
OMGGGGGGGG
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@kyungkyungdo oh may cute ulit sa timeline ko ;)
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
@kailibugan oh! jongin? tama ba?
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@kyungkyungdo wow you still remember me!
yixing @ikawnimais
............................
yixing @ikawnimais
/waits for HIS answer
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
@kailibugan haha ofc. you're from that play with the religious theme right?
yixing @ikawnimais
............................
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@kyungkyungdo HAHAHAHAHA religious theme! well, in a... way, yes it's religious?
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
@kailibugan ah! that's sounds nice. i really like it when people try to convey religious messages to make the youth understand it better! like sa play niyo!
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@kyungkyungdo iba ka din ah HAHAHAHA
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@kyungkyungdo btw are you free ng sunday?
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
@kailibugan uh yes i think?
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@kyungkyungdo yey! do you want to go to church sa chapel near my place?
yixing @ikawnimais
W O W
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
@kailibugan omg >< but... i am not really familiar sa place niyo. baka maligaw ako T___T
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@kyungkyungdo don't worry i can sundo you naman ;)
(づ￣ ³￣)づ @kyungkyungdo
@kailibugan omg nakakahiya naman sayo
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@kyungkyungdo it's totally fine! saka you're too cute mamaya may humarang pa sayo sa kalsada. dnw you to get hurt.
yixing @ikawnimais
W O W T A L A G A
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@kyungkyungdo and we have a rehearsal early afternoon for the rerun ng play pala. i can introduce you to the cast if you want~
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@kyungkyungdo and give you free tix too to see my itim na nazareno hihi ;)
And that just basically pushes Yixing to the edge of his patience. They may be "best friends" but there is no way in heaven he'll let Kyungsoo take everything that is supposed to be his. Extremely infuriated, he throws his phone to the bed and charges towards Kyungsoo's room.
"Hoy!" Yixing yells, turning the knob of Kyungsoo's door, pushing it so hard that it slams against the wall with a really loud bang. Kyungsoo jumps on his seat, his perenially wide eyes growing wider, quickly looking at Yixing's direction.
"Uy, Xing, what are you doing he-GET OFF ME!" Kyungsoo shrieks as Yixing tackles him to the bed, his laptop pushed aside and forgotten. Yixing wraps his hands around Kyungsoo's neck, tight enough so Kyungsoo panics, but loose so the other doesn't asphyxiate. He wants to make this a slow, painful death not via choking.
"YOU ARE THE WORST FRIEND EVER!" Yixing screams while shaking Kyungsoo, hands still wrapped around the other's neck.
"Yixing! Your laway! Yuck, tumatalsi-"
"I DON'T CARE! Oh god Kyungsoo! Tangina mo I thought you were a saint!" Yixing continues. He can feel Kyungsoo cringe beneath him when he cusses but he is too mad to actually care right now. He shakes his head. "Lahat nalang ng potential boylets ko kinukuha mo!"
"Y-Yixing! I can't breathe properly," Kyungsoo chokes.
"Say yes to Jongin and I swear friendship over!" Yixing narrows his eyes, and tightens his grasp around Kyungsoo's neck. "Naririnig mo ba ako, FRIENDSHIP," he punctuates this with a particularly rough shake, and follows it up with another one, "OVER."
Meanwhile...
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
ano na nangyari? bigla sila nawala
bow down @kingchendae
tanginang STFAP to
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
@kingchendae oh bakit?
bow down @kingchendae
@kailibugan ewan ko! i have to change brackets daw
bow down @kingchendae
wala STFAP binibigo mo ako
minsoak @xiumingawi
hello!
minsoak @xiumingawi
oh stfap
bow down @kingchendae
......
minsoak @xiumingawi
@kingchendae don't worry. hindi man ako sure kung bracket D ka o E1, sure na sure akong D kita kayang E1.
minsoak @xiumingawi
/runs
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
YUN YUN E.
bow down @kingchendae
ay puta
sexy and i know it @kailibugan
#SPARKS
Note:
1. Yey finally update! Sorry if it took so long but at least~ If you don't know STFAP, you can read this. The E is divided into two: E1 and E2.
2. Don't forget the hashtag #Big4AU okay?
3. Happy new year, everyone!