sigh...

[jleighbrown]

elena told me this weekend that she feels like I "put pressure on her to have sex". And when I "put on the pressure"....she doesnt want to have sex anymore. How lame do i think this is? Extremely. (I mean, really...life is so rough. a hot 24 year old wants to have sex with you all the time, you're 40, time is running out. what is the hold up

Comments

[fyrdyke]

yes, email is tasteless...but dammit it's my best forum too! ;)

i say call it off, however the hell you can, because she is just not good enough for you. talk about fuckin' with you...by apparently...*not* fuckin' with you!

there are many many other fish in the sea...no sense hanging on to the one who won't make up her mind what she wants.

my two cents...take it for what it's worth.

[doppmonster]

damnit, i just wrote a long comment and livejournal ate it. :(

summary: major props to you for seeing when something isn't working for you.

if it's important that you guys be on speaking terms after a breakup, i think an in-person conversation is worth it. a possible approach: start by describing what the relationship you currently have actually *is* so you can agree on what you're ending. then say it's not working for you anymore. then feel out how much she wants to hear about why, and be as honest as you can. then set clear boundaries for yourself (decide on them in advance) about what okay and what's not okay for you guys to do together from this point on. then tell her honestly what you hope your friendship can be like in the future.

Then hit her in the head with a signed Harlem Globetrotter's ball for good measure.

[jleighbrown]

Thanks Sarah:) Your comment made me chuckle out loud at work.

Ya, I wish I could do it by e-mail, which is like the grown up version of a 'note' that you would have given someone in junior high. It just seems so much easier. But alas, I would like to remain friends with her. Being grown up sucks sometimes.

Ha, and last night I went out for beers with all the gay boys in my tumbling class, and they said they would call her and do it for me. Very supportive boys they are. See, I have options. I just have to grab my balls to go with the *right* option.

At least right now I feel very clear headed about it. I'm not mad at her, I just know it's not right for me any more. But the reality of ending it is quite a pain to figure out how to deal with.

And yes, I would love to throw a signed harlem globetrotters ball at her head. Preferably one made out of cement or something heavier than your average basketball.

[fyrdyke]

you have access to a medicine ball at your tumbling class? heavier than your average basketball.

good luck. beers soon? please.