Ever looked at the thronged, bleary-eyed masses in some god-forsaken retail park and compared them in your head with cattle? I have. I bet you have too. Well you, me and everyone else has been utterly wrong and we've been doing that god-forsaken crowd a massive injustice. You see, after a rather revelatory trundle through Sky's bewildering ( Read more... )

It's amazing where inspiration can come from. Sometimes a thought, a spark, a wee microcosm forms in the brain and an idea pops into existence; sometimes it nags away at the back of your mind for days on end before springing forth a well of creativity and sometimes, if you're Paul McCartney, you go to sleep one night and wake up the next morning ( Read more... )

Here are the top three killers of the twentieth century ( Read more... )

I like Bentley. Note, if you will, that I didn't just say 'I like Bentleys', seeing as the cars themselves are now entirely the preserve of blinged-up rappers and Sheikh's with more money than The Vatican. However, I do like Bentley- the company itself- mainly because of the way they went about the gentlemanly pursuit of motor racing in the 1930' ( Read more... )

There are many things that mark us out from the animals of the world; the power of speech, the ability to reason and Stephen Fry being just three of them. However, possibly the biggest difference, and certainly the most enjoyable, is the ability to get monumentally distracted by inane trivia. It's fun, it passes time, and it levels the playing ( Read more... )

It's a pretty well known fact that kangaroos got their name from a bit of a linguistic balls-up between an Aborigine and a European bloke. Just to recap, the settler pointed at a passing kangaroo, asked the native what it was and was told "kangaroo" in reply, "kangaroo" being Aborigine for "I don't know". It is never explained what language the ( Read more... )

Paul Weller ( Read more... )

There follows an apology. I recently claimed that MySpace is like a school canteen when it's raining and no-one's allowed to go outside. I have since come to realise that this is utterly, utterly wrong and I take these sentiments beack whole-heartedly and without reservation. I am sorry for making such a heinous error of judgement. You see, ( Read more... )

Many things in the world confuse me. People exchanging sexy text messages for example; talking dirty to a physically intimate companion maybe an enjoyable pursuit, but I just can't help but think that things are less sexy with all the vowels missing. Prince may have dicked about with the spelling of the titles of his songs, but he never wailed "I ( Read more... )

Right, a quick quiz. Which of these is the odd one out ( Read more... )