Someone wants to fuck me ( Read more... )

Working in retail and living in Cheshire, it's remarkably easy for me to view humanity in something of a negative light- a seething mass that can be divided down the middle into 2 basic schools of idiocy; those who drive 4x4s that are cleaner than a laboratory at Intel and those who got pregnant on the same afternoon that puberty kicked in. ( Read more... )

At the risk of sounding like a mentalist (i.e. a practitioner of mentalism), my MP3 player has developed mind-reading capabilities and has now set about brazenly shaping many aspects of my life as of it's own will ( Read more... )

In the interests of having nothing better to do, I'm going to spend this particular Friday evening watching the annual light entertainment car-crash Children in Need and reporting my findings to you, dear readers ( Read more... )

The Party at the Boys' house on Saturday had many positive aspects; some top-notch costume work from the assembled masses, a particularly gruelling assault on the Roxanne Drinking Game, some disturbing comedy riffing on the sexual congress of Bonnie Langford and Kurt Angle, and an excellent routine from Leigh about crocadiles being cheesed off ( Read more... )

There was I, that is Terrence, and I was trying to make up my razoodock how to start this entry without blatantly ripping off a major touchstone of English literary heritage. Anyway, since last I tippy-tapped my way onto LJ I've been spending a lot of time back in Blackburn and I've also been with the missus for a relaxing sojourn down to Bath for ( Read more... )

This story starts with it's end ( Read more... )

And so it came to pass that last night I went to a tent on a wasteground in Liverpool and was promptly blown away. For a duo with a combined age of 350, shorn of the greatest rhythmn section in music history, Daltrey and Townshend still rock like a couple of twats on a hot tin bastard ( Read more... )

Since time immemorial, great minds have wrestled with the big questions- 'Who are we?', 'Why are we here?', 'What's that smell?' and, of course, 'Is it fun to drive a motorised shopping scootr down a travellator ( Read more... )

So that's my notice handed in at work, 4 weeks left of spending my nights in a supermarket before I pack my bags and head for WH Smiths. And the funny thing is I've realised I'm going to miss a few things. People mostly ( Read more... )