perhaps sadness means surrender, in which case, things are just going to have to change.

im just unhappy with myself. because i know i could have so much and i have so little. and all for nothing. and on top of it. i feel alone. so thats why i have been so quiet. thats why i have been so rude. so paranoid. im just unhappy.

oh now i remember why i was happier than usual this past week, i wasn't at fuckin school.

life is hard, upsetting, draining, amazing, beautiful, and fun, and i have to say i enjoy every second of it. because what if we didn't have our ups with our downs, and our downs with our ups. we wouldn't even know what our ups were. and on i seperate note, i can't believe college is so close. its this great feeling, mixed with a really nerve ( Read more... )

i don't want to check my mail anymore. and if an envelope comes i don't want it to be handed to me. i need a break at least for a week.
poop.

All I have to say is its fuckin cold. and I pray to god I get to go to school back here. Miss you all.. lovers prepare for phonecalls tommorow.

I'm off to Boston.
If I don't come back don't take it personally.
Love you all.
Stay sexy.

sincerly,
Joanna

So here is the thing about high school and life. Your social life will always be out of your control. It will fluxuate from great to ok to iffy to horrible. The timing of it all yes can sometimes be predicted, but even when predicted its still pretty much out of your control. People will make you laugh, let you down, make you cry, or just chill ( Read more... )

guess what i got today? a real cast. you better sign it beezies!

secret; my fingers still remained crossed for the future, perhaps untill someone else uncrosses them.