first joke ; text/action for New Barkers

[joxertheawesome]

You know, I really don't like it when people make jokes about being my mom. Especially when they're not funny jokes. No one likes unfunny jokes. And like that wasn't bad enough, she had to kick me out in the cold? Not cool.

You know what was cool? The Pokéballs. They're actually pretty realistic, or as realistic as you can get when you're talking

Comments

[text]

[wontdieifkilled]

This...isn't really a prank. I don't think anyone could pull off a prank on a scale this massive.

[text]

[joxertheawesome]

Well, I was totally going with it until the Rhyhorn.

But, uh. Yeah, it's... really a Rhyhorn. Even I don't know anyone who can swing something like this. Not even me.

[text]

[wontdieifkilled]

What do you by that?

[text]

[joxertheawesome]

I may have been a little generous earlier. You see, I am the Prince of Pranks. But even I couldn't pull a Rhyhorn out of a ball the size of an orange.

[text]

[blacklodged]

If this is a joke it's a very impressive one. If you already know of the games you will probably have an easier time adapting to this change than the most of us.

[text]

[joxertheawesome]

Yeah, I... beat both the games. Never had to climb a tree to escape from my own Pokémon, though. Kinda puts a damper on the whole becoming the very best that no one ever was bit.

[text]

[blacklodged]

I don't follow.

[text]

[joxertheawesome]

Trust me, you don't want to. I just got chased up a tree by a small tank. I'm not totally clear on how I'm supposed to use it for battling, unless -

I wonder if I can... jump down on it from here. Then I could ride it, right?

[Text]

[foolishwren]

... Hate to bust your bubble, but this isn't a prank.

Believe me, I kinda wished it was, at first.

Also, that mom lady seriously can't help it, I think there might actually be something wrong with her. It's kinda sad.

Anyway, get used to this place quick, Sparky

[Text]

[joxertheawesome]

Can't say I'm surprised. I've wished a lot of things were jokes before. Never worked.

What, am I stuck here?

[Text]

[foolishwren]

Yeah, welcome to my life.

And yes. Indefinitely. Sucks, but... them's the breaks.

[Text]

[joxertheawesome]

Could be worse, I guess. At least the scenery's new. And the Rhyhorn's kinda neat.

action ; I CAN'T LEAVE MARCO TO HIS .... GIANT RHYHORN LIKE THISS

[femaleprotag]

[Well it wasn't long after she saw that text that Minako is going to drop her stuff in the Lab and run outside to find the scene. Waving her arms to try and catch the Rhyhorn's attention, she yelled to try and get it to stop hitting the tree where, presumably, the trainer was hiding.]

Hey! Pick on someone your own size, big guy! [Yeah. Short teenaged girl and a ... Wooper. That was hopping in her footsteps through the snow and playing with a stick.]

action ; A-AWWW MY HERO

[joxertheawesome]

[ Marco's still fussing with his 'Gear, just trying to hang onto the branch he's draped on (and doing a decent job, so far), when the girl's shouting gets his attention.

As the Rhyhorn turns himself slowly around, Marco feels like he's watching a train wreck in slow motion. This can't go well. ]

Holy crap. Holy crap, what are you, crazy?

[ He's fumbling for the Rhyhorn's Pokéball as the beast stomps his feet slowly, one at a time. ]

action ; /heroic pose

[femaleprotag]

That's right, this way big guy... [Stubbornly keeping a good eye on the giant Pokemon, she gave a half smile towards the tree. This is nothing compared to the enormous Shadows she's fought so far, but then again, she had her Persona back home.]

Nope! I'll be fine, promise! [Snapping her fingers to catch her Wooper's attention, she pointed forward at the Rhyhorn.] Upa, get ready, it's gonna charge!

action ; /dokidoki! ♥

[joxertheawesome]

[ Having stomped each foot at least once (he thinks), the Rhyhorn decides now would be a good time to charge. So he does. He barrels in Minako and Upa's general direction, suddenly considerably faster. ]

Holy crap. [ Marco finally locates the Pokéball and messes with it for a moment, trying to sort out how to call Rhyhorn back with it. He's banging it against the tree when - ]

Holy crap!

[ The ball slips from his hand and lands on the ground below. Marco is left with no choice but to hide his face. ]

[uses_metaphors]

[Raven can't text back; his fingers are too big. So he switches to video to answer. Ever played Metal Gear Solid, Marco? Bet you hated Raven's boss fight.]

The mockery of one's maternal figure is generally in bad taste, but I do not believe the woman you are referring to means to be malicious. She is probably tired of strange people waking up in her home.

As for your question, there is an ancient saying that may be of use. "If it looks like a Rhyhorn, walks like a Rhyhorn, and sounds like a Rhyhorn, it is probably a Rhyhorn.

Unless it is a Ditto."

[joxertheawesome]

[ MGS would have released literally a month or so before Marco got here, lol. But I guarantee he's played it. ]

... Dude.

[ He's a little too amazed to even note the video function; he'd been wondering if it worked, but he's a wee bit distracted now. ]

Are you kidding me right now? Vulcan Raven?

... Wait. Please tell me this doesn't mean my life is a video game.

[uses_metaphors]

[I was hoping the he wasn't too early in the year.]

[Raven nods solemnly, preparing himself to speak with a teenager in his native language.]

Dude, I am he. It is a rare thing to be recognized here, though.

What do you mean, video game?

[He's heard the explanation of Johto and Pokemon being some sort of game, but he gets the feeling that the young man isn't referring to that.]

[joxertheawesome]

[ And now that he's registered that Raven's on video, he's decided not to use the video function, anyway. As long as Raven doesn't see him, maybe he'll think Marco's cool. ]

I hate to be the one to throw this at you, but... you're from a video game, man. I beat it last week.

If I'm in some kind of dimensional nexus for video games, I'm wondering if that means I'm from a video game, too. Or am I the player?