Hi girls, how you all?I am just posting to let you guys know i am still about i just dont post as much coz i am trying to limit my time on here as i am trying to pack it in.But its not that easy as its a mental affliction and i have obbseesions and compulsions like you guys so its hard to battle it and try and be like my family and friends want.And ( Read more... )

I am so happy!,well today i am and i have been for a while now i have only cut myself once this month and dont intend to do it again EVER!.I have lost one of my best mates coz of that and everything else thats wrong with me but it wont happen again coz i am going to be ok i dont need to do it anymore coz i am scared i dont want to loose aybody else ( Read more... )

I am sat down listening to my fave bloodhound gang album trying to relax and chain smoking and i text all my so called mates and told them my phone was on the blink so not to call or text me coz i wont get the messages but in reality i have just turned my phone off and chucked it in a drawer i just dont wanna talk to anyone anymore i have had ( Read more... )

i am needing to rant coz if i dont say somthing (even if its not to ppls faces) i will explode or implode or somthing.I feel like i am going nuts i keep thinking that everyone i know who CLAIM to care about me really dont at all never have never will.I really dont know why people waste their time and breath on me i wish everyone would fuck off and ( Read more... )

I have made a important decision (well it is to me)I have decided to try really really hard to STOP self harming i need to write down everything bad that has ever happened to me (not on here though)and read it and see if i can move on and get over it and stop blaming and hurting myself i really do hate myself and i hate all the men that hurt me as ( Read more... )

I feel very strange today!Me and my beau split up and he has moved out.It was my choice but i have lived with him for years and its very weird without him i dont think i will get much slep tonight as i have not slept alone for a long time.I am relieved in a way to be by myself and be with my kids and try and sort my head and life out but i feel so ( Read more... )

OH NO i dyed my hair ginger by accident and its awful its not even or anything (if it was alive it would be shot!) i am naturally baby blond but i dye my hair black but i decided to go back blond and i dyed it last night and it worked in places it looks like blond streaks and the rest has gone a chestnut color and some is still black DISASTER! ( Read more... )

Well its 6.20am.I have not posted in my journal for a few days don`t know why? maybe sometimes i cant be bothered.I went to the gym with my mom last night i managed to do well i went on the cross trainer for 62 mins that is the maximum the machine will let you do and burnt 822 (not bad) and then i went on the treadmill for 25 min and burnt 148. so ( Read more... )

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oh no! i done really well today then i spoil it by eating a pack of rolos at 246 cals i am so dissapointed with myself but i will do some extra exercise to try and compensate for my mistake. I will try again i never give up i am just fed up of having this ed and not being normal none of my normal friends freak out if they eat something why do i ( Read more... )