There is now something firmly ingrained in my mind that doesn't allow me to even think "committed." There's still guilt. And I hate that shit ( Read more... )

I bought a new bike today, and I'm quite pleased. Quite poor, but quite pleased. Funny how that is. I'm in a rather reflective mood, and I feel like typing but I don't feel like my usual self. I'm a little too serious right now. Whenever this mood befalls me I'm pretty sure it's not good, but maybe necessary. You really can't take things too ( Read more... )

It's my day off today, and I like it. I considered doing important things on my day off and I decided against it. A day off should be just that, a day off. I will look for an apartment with Kim, I think. And that's important, but it qualifies as crazy-fun-time also. I've recently been thinking about what I want to do. My ideas keep returning ( Read more... )

I have actually been doing a lot of pen and ink lately. I'm old fashioned that way. My LJ is comparable in that nobody reads it either. I got back on the ol' pedaling machine and went a few miles the other day, and that makes me happy. My knee is definitely a little happier. There is nothing like riding, and I'm thinking I want a new bike. Yes ( Read more... )

I am at a point where I feel pretty happy just being me for me by me. If I sound a little bit selfish, it's because maybe I am, and that's ok. I feel like there is so much for me to do and see. I'm at home now and it's pretty sweet. All of the drugs and women and fish and chips could never have prepared me for the wild times I'm having here ( Read more... )

I don't really know how to feel about life right now. Everything recently got a little crazy, in my mind and elsewhere I'm sure. I'm excited because I'm moving on to Peace Corps(hopefully). I'm scared shitless, lonely, bored, ashamed, sad, but I know it all comes along with the package. I broke up with my girlfriend last week. I'm probably ( Read more... )

Zoom, zoom, zoom... In a complete oblivious state I drove out to Kent yesterday. So what if almost 1 million people don't have power in the area, and a gigantic old tree uprooted and fell across the street; I can sleep through anything. I arrive in Kent and all of the schools are closed. It didn't even occur to me that they would even consider ( Read more... )

Ha! I guess it's been a really, really long time since I've written in this archaic online journal. It now has the charm of a vintage schwin or an old coke bottle. Sure I'm exagerating a little but that's what you are supposed to do when writing, especially journaling ( Read more... )

Today is only the best day of my life, because every new day is better than the last. I'm trying to trick myself into that frame of mind anyway. Tomorrow, tomorrow night, should be better than right now anyway. So, it's true! I'm eating this chocolate cookie, and I'm trying to stop. I'm going to be sick ( Read more... )

There's a sort of surreal quality to life after watching eXistenZ. Jude Law has never been in a better movie if you ask me. The quesion really boils down to "Is this still the game?" What if we did treat life as a game? I guess we wouldn't have the same problems we do in "real life" with say shooting someone down on the street. Of course, I'm ( Read more... )