Oh my god, I cant believe its been ten years since I created this journal! So much has changed in my life there's too much to write ( Read more... )

Trying to stop with the alcohol every night .. the shit feelings may come back but at least I might lose some weight! I need to!

When someone asks "are you okay" what else can you do but smile and say ... "yes thanks" because if you really told them how you were feeling, you'd probably be taken away!

Every day at work is an act, and I'm so good at it :)

When I get home, I can be me.

I cant sleep tonight and I have no desire to eat anything, now or tomorrow. Its so overwhelming and I dont actually know what I can do now. I was off work Thursday and Friday last week, because someone in my family was going through a crisis, I didnt want to leave them, things took a turn for the worse just an hour ago, and I have to be in work ( Read more... )

Back to work, and in my own little world again. Its comforting, peaceful, and safe in there.

Depression is overwhelming … so is life at the moment. How I feel in my head cannot be put into words, and yet I have a desperate need to get it out, to get the crap out of my head and out into the air, so it can disintegrate, disappear and leave me. It never does. I feel so out of control on so many levels, things are changing which I cannot ( Read more... )

Feeling very overwhelmed with so many things. Hello old friend, you're always there ... help me out now, I need you more than ever!

I cant stop purging, im totally getting on my husbands nerves with everything ... I can see the irritation. I feel really alone at the moment, I have no one in real life that I can tell about it. I feel so lost and out there with no way back.

Just needed to get that out.

Happy Birthday Kristi.

Thinking of you, as always xx

I feel so alone.