It really wasn't a surprise. Mum has reminded me that even if she did acknowledge the baby and was astonishingly unprejudiced, she doesn't have it in to her to be nice to the baby. She is not a cuddly grandmother.
Viable only means a 50% chance if I go into labour... but it's a start.
I hear you on your Grandma. It's hard. All of my grandparents have passed, but I do have two Great Aunts in their 90's. When it looked likely that we'd adopt a Black baby, I knew that would mean basically an end to any relationship with the Great Aunts. Their attitudes are just too racist, and all attempts my sister and I have made over the decades to address the subject with them have failed. I didn't even tell them that we were potentially going to be adopting.
Maybe your Grandma will come around someday, or maybe she won't. But - and I hate to say it so bluntly but I believe it's true - your relationship with your partner and Ponyo are more important.
I've had, as my family goes, a good relationship with Grandma. the fact is, though, she never loved her sons or her sons' children like she did her daughter - in fact, she was outright emotionally abusive - so things have always been quite distant. So it hurts, but it's not like there was much to lose. Izzy and the baby are far more important.
Foetuses can be really inconsiderate that way! They'll change their patterns without warning and suddenly you're all "....wait, he's usually pretty active around this time of day WHERE HAS HE GONE?!??!!11" and it'll turn out that (a) he just had a growth spurt and decided to sleep it off and/or (b) he's actually moving the whole time, but has rolled over/worked himself into a position where you can't feel it so much. If he's kicking the placenta rather than some more sensitive bit of you, you won't necessarily feel it
( ... )
I think what saved me from having to go in was being able to monitor his heatbeat from home - the midwife thought that was very reassuring. The thing is, once you're panicking... And normally I feel him *all the time*, every couple of minutes. Often just gently, but always there. I will actually miss that quite a lot once he's born. Mind you, the nasuea will be gone, too. (Commenting here in work-time because in a few minutes I will be back with my head down the loo, I can tell, so there's no point starting a new task. Again, very understanding work
( ... )
I have to say, all the nurses in the Labour and Delivery dept. (which is where they send you if you show up with any kind of foetal "emergency") are utterly charming and very, very kind -- no one hinted for a moment that I was silly to be alarmed, or sighed about my taking up a bed for 3 hours, or anything like that. While I was waiting for the doctor who was apparently required to see me before I could be discharged, they kept stopping by to look at the printouts and say "The baby looks good!" -- but pooh-poohed all my regrets about having overreacted: "It's always better to be safe than sorry! But the baby looks great
( ... )
I'm glad they were all kind! After all, everything looking good is exactly the best outcome.
I've been cuddling reborns quite a lot, lately, getting reused to the weight and supporting the head and all the rest. It's been a long time since the twins were that little.
I can see their argument - it's that we deal with that crap all the time in real life, so reading is escapism. But there are different kinds of escapism.
There's not much to deal with, I promise. Relations have always been difficult.
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Viable only means a 50% chance if I go into labour... but it's a start.
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Maybe your Grandma will come around someday, or maybe she won't. But - and I hate to say it so bluntly but I believe it's true - your relationship with your partner and Ponyo are more important.
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And my thoughts are with you a lot, my dear.
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I've been cuddling reborns quite a lot, lately, getting reused to the weight and supporting the head and all the rest. It's been a long time since the twins were that little.
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There's not much to deal with, I promise. Relations have always been difficult.
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