i have spent almost a whole semester criminalizing a cohort for her lack of keeping it together because i can. well, in the last month, my relationship with joni has been hitting the fan. it is never because i do not want to be there for her, but she is taking it that way. i know with this relationship, it has been difficult for me to focus on ( Read more... )

hi. i am just completely isolated in this program. i am losing sleep. i am losing time. i am losing friendships. i am losing the ground beneathe me. sometimes i miss that spontaneity, that lack of planning. it's notyou, it is me. but i don't know what it is that my difference is operating upon, other than i am an Other. and that's putting it ( Read more... )

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXY7DS6xmbU

theoretical analysis behind cultural amnesia and the project of invisibility

there have now been several women in my direct grad school community that have informed me of their "lesbian-isms." is there comfort in knowing that a socially constructed eroticized identity is something that i possess? what premises allows for these social transactions? is it because finding an "other" allows for the true expansionism of the ( Read more... )

perhaps i misjudged several things in this match-up between me and graduate reading. time, atmospheric barometer readings (fucking hot as hell), energy. not strange at all that these 3 occurrences are right-brained deductions of math and science. i must find a better way to divide my time and mindfully include that i need to be in school to attend ( Read more... )

"we will need more people with the same kind of defiance, willing to push themselves into the spotlight and to make some noise, to beat people up, to seduce women, to make mistakes, to become entrepreneurs, to stop doggedly pursuing official paper emblems attesting to their worthiness, to stop thinking those scraps of paper will secure anyone’s ( Read more... )

Perhaps I shouldn't think of this strictly as another monthly payment that has yet to come. After a year of complete aggravation and confusion, I decided to apply to two master's programs. The first, Cal State University San Marcos for Sociology and the second, San Diego State University for Women's Studies. I didn't get into San Diego and maybe ( Read more... )

Mom is with Kuya.

“How do I fix the world? Well I mean, obviously, we start paying teachers the amount we pay doctors, creating a competitive environment...so we pay teachers a fuckload of money so that it becomes...they get paid like actors...yeah, that’s it...and you have like Academy Awards for the best teachers so teachers become the celebrities, fucking make it ( Read more... )