Toy Soldiers: Congress (PG)
Summary: Sitting around, late at night, and shooting the shit.
Notes: Written for gloriana's flashfic challenge, with a side of prompt 86, "choices". Thanks to thesilentpoet for giving this a quick beta-read. Pre-canon, usual low-grade slashiness (from me, you expected something else?).
CONGRESS
*
I'm never running for political office, Billy says.
It's not something that should stick out, really. It's been a long night of shooting the shit, talking about whatever came to mind and some stuff that had no right to -- what colors M&Ms would be if they weren't the colors they were, bird watching (which Phil says can actually be fun, even though nobody believes him, and which he attempts to back up with ever more impossible species of bird), beautiful women, beautiful men (Snuffy's fault, although even Ric, who's as straight as they come, joined in), what they're gonna do when they grow up.
And then there's that moment of silence, and Billy says he's never running for political office.
No shit, Hank says before Joey can get there. The stuff they could pull out when you're running for election? You wouldn't even get the nomination.
No, Billy says, and sits up. I mean, even if I could get the nomination.
It's not that bad, Snuffy says from where he's lying on the floor.
Think about it, Billy says. If you're a jerk, that's one thing, but if you actually want to get shit done?
What? Ric says, and Joey shushes him.
The only way to get anywhere in politics is to be a jerk, Billy says. But if you're a jerk, nobody gives a shit about you, you don't deserve to be happy.
Wait, this is about happiness?
Yeah, it's about getting somewhere, getting something done. The only reason why someone should go into politics is to, I don't know, save the world. Fix up all the bullshit that's in government. No offense, he adds.
Snuffy and Hank, whose fathers are in politics, just shrug.
But an idealist isn't going to get anywhere, because you have to be a jerk. So if you're in politics, you're either unhappy because you're not getting anything accomplished, or unhappy because you're a jerk.
There's a moment of silence, then Hank shakes his head and says, No, Billy, you shouldn't go into politics because you're talking out your ass.
Oh, fuck you, Billy says, and throws a pillow at him.
Joey waits until the others are distracted, and murmurs in Billy's ear, I'd vote for you.
That's because you're an idiot, too, Billy says, and touches Joey's hand instead of a kiss.
-end-
Notes: Written for gloriana's flashfic challenge, with a side of prompt 86, "choices". Thanks to thesilentpoet for giving this a quick beta-read. Pre-canon, usual low-grade slashiness (from me, you expected something else?).
CONGRESS
*
I'm never running for political office, Billy says.
It's not something that should stick out, really. It's been a long night of shooting the shit, talking about whatever came to mind and some stuff that had no right to -- what colors M&Ms would be if they weren't the colors they were, bird watching (which Phil says can actually be fun, even though nobody believes him, and which he attempts to back up with ever more impossible species of bird), beautiful women, beautiful men (Snuffy's fault, although even Ric, who's as straight as they come, joined in), what they're gonna do when they grow up.
And then there's that moment of silence, and Billy says he's never running for political office.
No shit, Hank says before Joey can get there. The stuff they could pull out when you're running for election? You wouldn't even get the nomination.
No, Billy says, and sits up. I mean, even if I could get the nomination.
It's not that bad, Snuffy says from where he's lying on the floor.
Think about it, Billy says. If you're a jerk, that's one thing, but if you actually want to get shit done?
What? Ric says, and Joey shushes him.
The only way to get anywhere in politics is to be a jerk, Billy says. But if you're a jerk, nobody gives a shit about you, you don't deserve to be happy.
Wait, this is about happiness?
Yeah, it's about getting somewhere, getting something done. The only reason why someone should go into politics is to, I don't know, save the world. Fix up all the bullshit that's in government. No offense, he adds.
Snuffy and Hank, whose fathers are in politics, just shrug.
But an idealist isn't going to get anywhere, because you have to be a jerk. So if you're in politics, you're either unhappy because you're not getting anything accomplished, or unhappy because you're a jerk.
There's a moment of silence, then Hank shakes his head and says, No, Billy, you shouldn't go into politics because you're talking out your ass.
Oh, fuck you, Billy says, and throws a pillow at him.
Joey waits until the others are distracted, and murmurs in Billy's ear, I'd vote for you.
That's because you're an idiot, too, Billy says, and touches Joey's hand instead of a kiss.
-end-