im not happy unless im at kacis house. that much is obvious. well, when im at ryans i feel ok, im just bored. but i like it here. alot. i think, i think im movin in. for good. really ( Read more... )

i am so hungry, it feels like my stomach is eating itself. something is seriously wrong with me though, because every time i eat i think about toby, and i have to go thow up. so...do i even bother eating ( Read more... )

ok. this is so horrible ( Read more... )

ad astra per alia porci..."to the stars on the wings of a pig ( Read more... )

this is where my life
comes to a screeching halt
this is how it has to be
dont think it was your fault
dont think that i dont notice
all youve ever done for me
and dont think that im ungrateful
for who youve helped me be
but imperfection overcomes this time
no, it cant be overthrown
so im waiting this one out...
and i have to do it alone.

feeling better. thought you ought to know ( Read more... )

i hate the fucking clock. i wish i could smash it. i wish i could smash anything, right now, actually. i get so mad. over stupid things. want to know why? because im a loser, and no ever taught me any better, so now i have to deal with this on my own. i hate this. i hate it so much, and it makes me so mad, that i cant even breathe in here. its like ( Read more... )

july 5 dawns cold and grey, and i despise it for being so. i woke up today at about nine thirty, and i was in the worst mood humanly possible. you would think, after talking to my best friend until about 1 in the morning, and after getting a lot of things off my chest, after realizing how wonderful and understanding he really is, that i would feel ( Read more... )

i always feel as though there are peices missing. i cant explain it. today is the fourth of july, and ever since my dad left, every holiday for me has SUCKED. especially today. i guess because he doesnt live with us anymore, that means he doenst have to try and be a father anymore either. well, i went to my grandfathers today, hung out with my ( Read more... )

Hope dangles on a string ( Read more... )