I felt I needed to do this.
Clearly I never write on here anymore, but I needed to get some things off my chest.
This year has been nothing I was expecting.
A guy lied through his teeth and I believed him.
One day he just stopped talking to me, I never found out why.
Meanwhile someone else had interest in me.
I was curious why he gave me the time of day ( Read more... )

First thing on my mind;
I keep having terrible dreams where I wake up in tears.
In these dreams Rob cheats on me.
Since this has happened in my dream more than once I decided to look up any meaning it may have.

To dream that your mate, spouse, or significant other is cheating on you, highlights your insecurities and your fears of being abandoned. You ( Read more... )

This past year has been so chaotic, everything I once knew became no longer.
So I decided to go to the place I've always felt at home again this summer.
Although they don't offer me much I thought it may give me back just a little of the feeling I missed.
Now after a week of training I've come to realize I can't even have that.
Everything has changed ( Read more... )

This house is so dead and broken.
It's so sad to see, you can feel it in the air.
It was never the greatest but now it's not even considered a home.
Once a house is no longer a home nothing feels right in it.

I have to look ahead.
I need to find where I belong.
I need to discover where my home really is.
I'll be working on that.


( Read more... )

This is when I start my journey.
I forgot where I'm going.
My feelings are neutral.
I do what I was taught would lead to a positive end.
I'm now the adult in my family.
Then again I never really was the kid.
Emotions are impractical.
No one wants to be the one to try to keep a connection.
I've lost motivation myself which makes me realize no one else is ( Read more... )

I'm not quite sure where to begin.
Obviously it's been a while.
There's been pretty much no alone time since I've been at college.
I don't necessarily believe that's a bad thing.
The 1st night I was here my dad called me asking if I knew where my mother was.
Apparently she left a message saying she wasn't coming home.
I can't say I'm surprised, I'm ( Read more... )

My apologies, I was out of society for 7 weeks.
Yeah camp has come to an end.
I don't know how I feel about that.
I felt I was really underappriciated which makes it hard for me to see myself there next year.
Then again it is camp, the place I grew up, how can I just leave like that?
I suppose we'll see once applications come around.
I had some fun don't ( Read more... )

It's been a while, this may be lengthy.
Since my last post I've read Twilight, New Moon, and most of Eclipse. 
I've gone to senior ball.
I've taken and failed another road test... which I should have passed but I had the lady who fails everyone.
I've had my last day of high school classes.
I've had my first icecream from coldstone; mint with brownies ( Read more... )

Warning; I just failed my road test so this will be hard to make positive.
NYC was kinda lame... concidering I was with Bel Canto.
I had and extra $260ish just for the trip.
I definitly had $160 left.
Thus showing that the whole shopping thing didn't really happen.
I got a total of 4 items for meself and 3 things for my parents and Alec.
Shot glass for ( Read more... )

Alright trying to think back...
Friday Alec and I swung by the lilac fest to get funnel cake.
Ohh and the mall to order my new shoesss :]
Then we went to Ben's for cards and watched Weeds.
Saturday I worked, after Scott, Alexa, Alec and I went to the Club House.
We go-karted and mini-golfed.
I must say mini-golf is lame but go-karting is freaking awesome ( Read more... )