Taken out to dinner by Lilly, whose name I repeatedly mistake. We devour a steak in a group of girls, but she tells me she wishes we were alone. 'Not for conversation', and I choke on my fry. For hours we talk in the car outside her house, and she tells me ( Read more... )

...to be so angry.

You wanted a poem. You will find out eventually that this place is not your home. It's mine. And while if I have to share all my others with you, if I have to compromise, and bend and bend and bend and not break then this place. This place. Will be mine. Here's your poem ( Read more... )

For the same reason that women in Afghanistan protested the removal of the Taliban, I find myself watching two wedding movies in one night. For the same reason 70-year-old women paint the same (now crooked) lips they've been wearing for 20 years. A system of ideas, no matter how oppressive, is a security to cling too ( Read more... )

The color between deep black and surface gold that you can only find at equilibrium under the water when you're not breathing bubbles out ( Read more... )

I'm in unfamiliar company driving under the Magnolia water tower in a southern Californian scrub desert. It's the hill behind Mom's childhood home where the lake and the coyote wait, but before I reach the top I run out of time and have to turn around, still wondering what the other side might look like ( Read more... )

This has only ever been a private place in the part of my brain that longs to have my work live on its own outside of its time, setting, and maudlin maunderings of one more mal-adjusted misanthrope. The truth is, if I wasn't writing for an audience, if this wasn't my personal publishing, my airing of the wares, de-cluttering of closets, none of ( Read more... )

My calves are sore from walking with such purpose today. I crave a time when moments of sincerity linger. Was it just this morning that I found such inspiration in school? It's proven that success heightens performance ( Read more... )

After 6 hours in the bar, making money, smiling, shining, and poisoning people I go dancing. There is almost no one there when I arrive. I walk right past topher, djing, without recognizing him. Per usual ( Read more... )

A week running, I couldn't leave the house. Today sneaking out with book in hand to stroll to school an hour late, just for the sun and the signs that if I lift the curtain the light will come ( Read more... )