Right, so I'm in Abu Dhabi and..

[kimbalion]

My most recent work project failed to get off to a flying start yesterday. Well, to be a fair the plane did too. On my way to Pakistan via the United Arab Emirates, my first flight was sat at Amsterdam Schiphol on the runway with engineering problems for 5 1/2 hours*. When we finally made it to our destination, I was greeted with the cheery news

Comments

[scruff]

Their tagline is "KLM Royal Dutch Airlines - The Reliable Airline".

It's also quite clear that what they can be relied on to do!

[kimbalion]

Another thing they can be relied on to do is send a crummy Eur25,- discount voucher if I complain. At this point I feel that nothing less than the ritual disembowelment* of one of KLM's staff will be adequate.

* With a spork.

[footpad]

You are aware of your rights under the, um, whatsitsname, Warsaw Convention? Because they should be one hell of a lot meatier than €25.

[bohor]

If it was mechanical, I think they're also responsible for covering the cost of the room due to the missed connection.

[kimbalion]

Albeit a bit of a rare one! Sadly this flight was packed to the gills with uncomfortable, sweaty people on their way to a far less preferable destination. :D

(Oddly, the one time I flew Virgin Atlantic I had a very similar experience - the plane was practically empty! o.O)

[sharpanther]

Glad to see you're having a good time.

[kimbalion]

You know, there's nothing quite like the dry wit and subtle sarcasm of the Dutch to make one homesick. ;)

(Oop no, my bad. That's just food poisoning.)

[ducktapeddonkey]

Nothing like having your plane repaired on the runway to inspire confidence.

Five and a half hours too! You'd think that when it looked like it might be more than an hour, they'd let the passengers go back into the terminal.

Personally, I hate flying.

Actually, I should qualify that; I hate flying on commercial airlines. I've never been on one yet that had a seat designed to fit me, and I'm not even that big of a guy.

I used to combat my discomfort by drinking heavily before before and during a flight if possible. But I've come to discover that both my patience and tolerance are greatly diminished after several drinks in an airplane. So now I tend to fly painfully sober.

Sounds like you're having quite the adventure already. Even though I'm not happy about having to spend the next week in Middle-of-Nowhere Mississippi, I think I'd rather be there than in Pakistan.

I hope the rest of your trip goes well.

[kimbalion]

Middle of nowhere, Mississippi? Blimey, what're you doing there? You know, I think I'd take Pakistan if I had the choice.

As for the airline seats.. oy. It took about a week before I could feel my left arsecheek again.

[mattlazycat]

I'm sort of twistedly glad that this shit happens to you, if only because you can cope with it and it uses up the ludicrous shit quota for the year so none of the rest of us have to suffer ;)

Thanks for making me laugh aloud at your description of being outside, and good luck getting to your destination .. ever. :)

[kimbalion]

*laughs!* I was rather hoping that I've used up my own personal ludicrous shit quota and would therefore suffer none more during my trip. Alas, this was not to be and I've ended up in even -more- stupid situations since. Post to follow.