everything's coming together. It's wholesome to be home, and the place is a little more like itself everyday. I'm running out of things to be worried about, which means maybe I can finally just be myself.

it's raining now, and I'm in a cafe with my tea in a jar and my laptop. I've got on me long knit socks and my tummy is warm. ees goot.

content comfortable focused worried tired distracted restless worn anxious close horny happy

Now my problem is that I spend too much time thinking of how things will be. I get stressed out thinking about the future, and then it makes the present anxious and cluttered. I know what I need to do, but it's so hard to change a way of mind.

32 oz of social skills

I was in and out this summer, riding through places and thinking too much. When I got home, it was comfortable and different. The place is a time warp. Same friends, but everyone looks a little older, and everyone's a little more distant. And the space between the ones who won't move on and the ones who are changing fast grows a little bigger. This ( Read more... )

I miss you big spoon.

I want to tell you the story of our lives together. How we drove our yellow school bus all the way to moon tribe, and dropped in the mojave desert. how we painted our faces, sang songs, and laid on the beach all day. oh we were dirty and sleepy and out of our minds, and together ( Read more... )

Saturday, I don't know what that was. Not lust. But it gave me a lot to think about. And then I put it plainly, I'm afraid of intensity with people. He rubbed my belly and laughed, but dwelled on it for a moment. With Tommy, you know he's making an observation. He's knows people better than most.

Richard and Devin knocked on the door and asked for only "the downest of the down" to come on their trip. At first I felt pretty good about saying no, because I had a lot of work to do the next day. seemed irresponsible. But when I explained myself to Richard he said, "man, you don't have to do ANYTHING if you don't want to. except brush your teeth ( Read more... )

After psych 140 on mondays and wednesdays I've got a few free hours before my next class. Richard, Suman, & I have been spending our time on the benches in front of Dwinelle (non-space) and enjoy the sun, people watch. Last week we made a sign that says FREE CONVERSATION, and we've just been laying in the sun and pushing the sign in the air. It's ( Read more... )