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Proper Thinking Processes
I have to clear myself of the excess. The extra bodies that occupy this space i have squeezed myself into. I let them in as safe haven. Sharing the struggle and enjoying the company. But we cant share this place anymore. Cramped and uncomfortable we fidget into tighter corners to get away from the annoyances. Right now im thinking of a place where ( Read more... ) -
Always
Just so you know, I have never and will never forget you. I feel bad because recently my lifestyle might reflect that your short life didnt make an imact on me. Thats the furthest thing from truth. You are the best thing I ever knew. A best friend that held me together in the most painful days. Your sudden disappearance will always weigh heavy on ( Read more... ) -
Stripped of the Lable
I never wanted to be that girl. Fit into neat little boxes. Characterized ( Read more... ) -
fly by updates in the aftermath of the storm
holy crap lj its been a while. In the time ive been away i fell in love. Got pregnant. Lost the baby and weathered a hurricane. But this girl is still alive and pushing. Still in love and weathering other personal less tangible storms. I have a place... Albeit a tiny place but its MINE and i earned it. Im proud of my resolve. And losing patience ( Read more... ) -
The Mind Truly Rules Everything...
I have always heard that letting yourself stress and succumb to anxiety can have real physical effects on your body. But I never knew the real truth of that until today. I have been having ongoing stomach issues, cramping and vomiting and other fun stuff. Together with extreme fatigue and disorientation and confusion and my already chronic aches ( Read more... ) -
I just want...
In the wake of getting over him (sometimes my ability to bounce back amazes even me, he's becoming something like a distant memory in my head) I'm feeling that ache in my skin again. The overwhelming need to be touched. The desire for skin to skin contact. There were so many times that I wondered about myself and my constant need for physical ( Read more... ) -
Heartbreak and that persistent ache...
Finally starting to enter a better mental space than last week. I dont want to say that I never wanna feel that again. I dont think its possible to hold off heartbreak in all honesty. Its a part of life that we cant avoid. But I dont ever wanna feel quite so broken down again. And dont want to put myself in that predicament again ( Read more... ) -
just dont know anymore...
Been spending the last few days trying to run away from how much this hurts. Realistically I know I can't do that. But this is testing my new found ability to process feelings in a healthy way. My trust in everything is destroyed. Including in myself. I don't know how to pick these pieces back up again. And I'm not sure exactly how to avoid the ( Read more... ) -
Shake it Off
shake it off, shake it off, shake it off...
the sweat. the fear. the mistakes and late night brainstorming sessions gone awry. no one can hear this but you so why do you whisper? why do you hold it in like the smoke we use to chase away the nighttimes in our minds? breathing it in, clear and awakening. then letting it sit stagnant in the lungs. ( Read more... ) -
....
So I'm thinking that I should share my tumblr here. I dont exactly post there all the time. and its certainly not in the way that I post here, mostly quotes and pics. but its actually alot easier to connect different accounts to tumblr than it is here :(
its http://amfknriot.tumblr.com/ and you should check it out. just saying. im not closing down ( Read more... )