Comments | knitwitfics: 24: "Hold On" (Part 1 of a possible series)

knitwitfics

24: "Hold On" (Part 1 of a possible series)

Apr 14, 2009 20:03

Title: Hold On (Part 1 of a possible series)
Fandom: 24
Characters: Jack Bauer, Renee Walker
Spoilers: Up to and including 7x17
Warnings: ...If you've seen the episode, you can imagine anything I might warn about.
Summary: She's the only thing he has to hold on to, even as he feels his grip start to slip.
Author's Note: This was entirely written and ( Read more... )

24, renee walker, jack bauer

Comments 22

ams87 April 15 2009, 00:24:59 UTC

This is brilliant. Sad and haunting but lovely writing. Poor Jack :(

kcountess April 15 2009, 03:11:15 UTC

Thanks! And augh, yes. I think the mental deterioration is much harder for him to deal with than the physical.

ams87 April 15 2009, 12:59:10 UTC

Yeah it will be, we'll just have to see how it all plays out for poor Jack :(

cybertoothtiger April 15 2009, 01:09:32 UTC

Gah. The hurt, the comfort! Loved this.

He'd had practice injecting himself with shaky hands, but even this was beyond him.

This, and the comparison to China -- yes. Poor Jack.

Already he was having trouble keeping his mind from wandering; he couldn't be sure how much longer he'd be coherent enough to say this.

Oh, didn't you just want to DIE when he said they'd better let him debrief soon, because he didn't know how long he'd be able to? Gerp. My sentences fail me.

kcountess April 15 2009, 03:13:25 UTC

Yeah, I thought considering the situation and the treatment, China had to be something that would start filtering into the hallucinations. And it's something where, at first, he wouldn't really be aware that it was a hallucination, as opposed to a flashback.

And AUGH YES, that bit killed me, though I was also melting that he was admitting that to Renee. Showing her his vulnerable side is a good thing!

cybertoothtiger April 15 2009, 03:32:06 UTC

Yes, some Cheng flashbacks are definitely warranted, although I don't expect the show to have that much continuity. My Grandpa was a soldier in WWI, and when he died in hospital in the 1970s, he was convinced the Germans had got him. Poor guy.

GAH. I kinda hope the writers don't take Jack there, although part of me also wants to see the angst. Especially with Renee watching. Is that sick? That's pretty sick, isn't it?

kcountess April 15 2009, 03:57:05 UTC

Ugh, that must have been awful, both for him and for you. *hugs*

And at least they gave us the scars?

And yeah, same here. And yes, it's sick, but then considering what I do to my RP characters, you're in good company? :D

Thread 5

buongiornodaisy April 15 2009, 02:57:55 UTC

Why on this green earth are you not writing the show, bb?

kcountess April 15 2009, 03:14:00 UTC

Because I don't have any Hollywood street cred? :D

*snugs*

buongiornodaisy April 15 2009, 03:15:43 UTC

Woe.

I think the show could benefit from your hardcore clinging to and incorporation of continuity. CONTINUITY IS UR FRIEND.

kcountess April 15 2009, 04:01:28 UTC

YES IT IS. But then if I wrote the show, they'd spend half the episodes talking too damn much.

leigh57 April 15 2009, 03:44:26 UTC

Um. I'm really having a hard time with the words since last night, so forgive me if I make no sense. But there is nothing about this I do not love, save of course watching Jack deteriorate even further. I honestly can't decide whether I'm up to watching him slowly lose his mind, even though it would make for fantastic drama.

However, you write it amazingly, and of course the shipper side of me just broke in all the places where you had him thinking for a second that he was back in China and then remembering that it was actually Renee, that he could trust her. AUGH SHOW!

This also killed me: "It was hard to believe they'd only met that morning, and already he trusted her more than almost anyone else. As much as Tony or Chloe at least. If they'd had more time to work together, if they'd known each other a few years ago...

But they didn't. Thinking about the ifs wasn't going to help."

Just. . . thank you for writing them. Completely like crack, and even after my Monday hit I never have enough.

kcountess April 15 2009, 04:00:46 UTC

Awwwwwww, thanks. And AUGH yeah while on the one hand watching Jack slowly fall apart mentally would be great drama, it would also be insanely painful.

And heh, this is kinda building to some shippiness, if I make this part of a larger work. Barely whispers of it at the moment, but it's setting the ground work. :D

*hugs* I know, I was just telling moofoot that I need some Jack/Renee schmoop as an antidote to last night.

leigh57 April 15 2009, 12:51:05 UTC

Eeeeeee! I vote for lots more schmoop;) I'm so mad that I can't write at the moment, because I have a ton of schmoop running around in my own head, but no time to put it down. Blah! And I'm definitely a fan of you turning this into a larger work. Yep yep yep:)

mulefa April 15 2009, 09:31:54 UTC

Great writing - loved the China flashbacks