[девять]

[kol_shevik]

[For the past two days, 1444 Mitchell Road may have noticed Russia acting...oddly. I mean moreso than normal-oddly. Writing something over and over on whatever paper he can find, and stuffing them into envelopes and eating all of that candy in the house. It's a huge pile No you aren't allowed to see it don't touch it--

Until now at least. Because

Comments

[supersizedpower]

[reads

is horrified

mails copies to England, Lithuania, and, oh yeah, Russia.]

[kol_shevik]

[HOLY SHIT WHERE DO THESE KEEP COMING FROM

after a small meltdown

mails copies to England, Lithuania, and, oh yeah, America.]

[supersizedpower]

[AHHHHHHHHHH

mails to England, Lithuania, and Russia ASAP]

[kol_shevik]

[OH MY GOD khrushchev where are you to shake shoes at the bad things til they go away

Mails so fast to England Lithuania and America]

[supersizedpower]

[goes out to the mailbox to fill it with garlic and

finds another one OH GOD

sends it to England, Lithuania, and Russia]

[kol_shevik]

[Drinking to ease the pain waiting watching the mailbox.

OH SWEET GLORIOUS UNION OF SOCIALIST STATES.
Why is there

Another.

Mails to England, Lithania, and America.]

[supersizedpower]

[Stress eating Halloween candy like a little fat kid

when suddenly

OH DEAR SWEET LINCOLN'S GHOST WHERE ARE YOU WHEN I NEED YOU

Mails three copies to England, Lithuania, and Russia]

[kol_shevik]

[Having finished all the candy

starts on the rest of the pantry, regardless of edibility.

HIGHLY REGARDED LENIN'S WELL-PRESERVED BODY WHY ARE YOU NOT GRACING ME WITH YOUR PROTECTIVE COMMUNIST GLORY?

Mails 10 copies to England, Lithuania, and America.]

[supersizedpower]

[Shoving tootsie rolls in his mouth and trying not to cry because he's a hero, and heroes don't cry and

sob

sob

BELIEVES IN THE GEORGE WHO BELIEVES IN HIM and

mails 30 copies to England, Lithuania, and Russia]

[kol_shevik]

[Gnawing on a carboard box of baking soda

this isn't very tasty

FOR ALL THE HONOR OF COMRADE STALIN and

mails 47 clean and 1 tear stained copy to England, Lithuania and America.]

[supersizedpower]

[OH GOD WHAT ARE THOSE MARKS

ARE THEY GHOST FINGERPRINTS

OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD

e-engwand

mails two copies before his pen runs out of ink to England, Lithuania, and Russia]

[kol_shevik]

[CHEWING HIS PENS IN HALF

so they spill everywhere

all over the three copies he manages to finish

and sends to England, Lithuania and America.

There are no more pens.]

[supersizedpower]

[Ahhhh he's out of ink but then he has a great idea

sends a letter to England, Lithuania, and Russia written in ketchup]

[kol_shevik]

[Is this blood why does he have funny smelling letters written in blood--

Digs through the house for newspapers and magazines

sends England, Lithuania and America letters made of letters.]

[supersizedpower]

[AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Goes into the kitchen to make more ketchup letters and

gets hungry and makes a burger and fries instead

goes to watch The Lone Ranger for a bit

and then remembers Halloween is coming up and works on putting together a Halloween costume and

tries it on and poses in front of the mirror for a while and then

gets hungry again and goes to get another snack and

AHHHHHHHH finds the letters again is that blood and

mails three half finished ketchup letters to England, Lithuania, and Russia.]

[kol_shevik]

[AUUUGHHH

his is a letter of misfortune!!
You must copy and send this letter to three other people within

Within

what.

Why are these written in blood.

To calm his nerves, Russia watches some I Love Lucy and torments the drone child for a while.

Then just mails a flyer for a sale at Sears and Roebuck's, a coupon for 5 cents off cereal and an advertisement for women's hosiery to England, Lithuania and America.]