[четыре]

[kol_shevik]

 [ Instead of filters, Russia has chosen the time-tested of method of "maybe if I whisper really loudly into the phone, no one will know it is me." ]

If a friend of Rus-- mine is is needing to speak to his children about proper conduct with Nice Socialist Boys, where should friend be starting? And how are you properly phrasing such things? Rus-- He

Comments

[peonymarket]

[also whispering into the phone; no need for Vietnam to find out he escaped the bathroom and her [CENSORED] drawings]

Nice what boys?

[kol_shevik]

Russia would like to take time to clarify and make very specific that he is meaning only Russian boys as well.

[peonymarket]

Ah. Well, first must discuss marriage price.

[kol_shevik]

Did not think such things came with a price anymore.

[tsuntiger]

Wh-what?

[kol_shevik]

Should Russia begin with describing what he will do to intestines of boys that are breathing too closely or with horrible diseases that are spread by inappropriate touching of hands?

[tsuntiger]

[Oh dear... Taiga's actually...

liking where this is going]

Start with how disgusting guys look naked, and how they think with their crotch all the time! And then, are you going to trade their organs on the black market? You really should!

[kol_shevik]

Russia does not look disgusting naked. Perhaps should keep organs in little jars to warn the others! Will be very effective.

[sonic_enforcer]

It depends on just what it is you are trying to explain.

[kol_shevik]

Is not Russia.

Is Russia's friend.

[sonic_enforcer]

Oh. Yes.

What is it that your friend is trying to explain, exactly?

[kol_shevik]

He would like to be starting with how it is forbidden until she is 40, and end with how it is extremely forbidden until she is 40.

But then she must have at least ten children, or Motherland will be disappointed.

[supersizedpower]

...

[just laughing]

[kol_shevik]

Love is not funny joke to be laughed at.

Stop laughing.

Do not laugh at Russia.

[supersizedpower]

You don't know how it works?

[kol_shevik]

Russia learned many things from Catherine, but speaking about such things for proper worker's ears is not one of them.

[when_in_me]

I'm happy you came to me with this, and I think I can help you.

[kol_shevik]

Very good! We will begin right away, Да?

[when_in_me]

Of course! You see, when a man loves a woman very much, he puts his [CENSORED] in her [CENSORED]. If the woman really loves the man, though, they'll take their [CENSORED] and slather on some [CENSORED] and start [CENSORING] all over the [CENSORED].

[kol_shevik]

Oh.