Ye gods and tiny fishies

[la_sonnambula]

I commented in cleolinda’s journal that I must remember to brace myself whenever I go to imdb.com. Many times I'd found myself shambling over there to look up some innocuous info, only to be confronted by their Sidebar of Doom. A la-la-la venture turned to “Oh my god, not him/her

Comments

[missbingley]

Tom Cruise, his attorneys and the Church of Scientology please ask you to cease and desist with regards to your discussion of homosexual chemistry on the set of Tom Cruise movies. All of Mr. Cruise's movies are stunningly heterosexual except, Mr. Cruise concedes, for Top Gun and Mr. Cruise regrets Val Kilmer's decision to "camp the movie up".

Thank you for linking to your audiography post! I love the songs you uploaded.

I feel incredibly vindicated after seeing Viggo in his tap-dancing suit. I called it ages ago, bitches! U-G-L-Y, he ain't got no alibi.

[la_sonnambula]

Bring. It. On. Tommy Boy! Casey Novak is my attorney, I ain't skeered. Actually, when I was writing this post, paranoia seized me and I thought of Cruise and his army of robots scouring the internet of writing that contains the words "Tom Cruise" and "homosexual" in proximity to each other, finding this entry and siccing his stable of lawyers at me.

Special Guest Star Heather Locklear As Amanda

Awesome name!

I'm so glad that you like the songs.

Like an alien chased by the F.B.I!

[noblerot]

Maldoror is so great.

Tom Cruise? Not.

Seen this?

[la_sonnambula]

I agree. Tom Cruise is not great. He certainly can't hold a candle to a French surrealist epic poem. Now that Maldoror has gotten your thumbs up, I want to read it even more.

No, I've never seen the "How To" guide for sex with dolphins. Prehensile Penis! Bisexuality (at least, if his partner were a dolphin)! Manipulative vagina muscles! Simultaneous climaxes! Mr. Dragon-wolfe Dolphinn is a regular Dr. Ruth to the doplphin lovers out there.

Coincidentally, a few days ago I saw the episode of King of the Hill in which Hank was traumatised by a humping incident with a male dolphin.

[la_sonnambula]

The same moustache, a couple of hundred years later, doesn't look out of place on top of a 70's gay pornstar's upper lip. Sic transit gloria, I tell you.

[la_sonnambula]

Mmmhmm, the gay-for-pay actor.

[edda]

I also didn’t know he was gay and that he and James Ivory were partners in every sense of the word.

GET THE FUCK OUT!! Were they seriously? I totally had no freaking idea. I though they were just fussy old British men who liked corsety stuff. As old British men are wont to. Well, hell. Poor James, hope he's OK.

the Mustache of Maturity and Sexual Denial

BWAH!

Your boyfriend is cute, in that sinewy way of his.

Tom Cruise is--there aren't words anymore. God, what a freak.

He isn't my husband, he's my boyfriend, and I swear to God, I just turned my back for a minute. "No, honey, you are NOT going out to make a solidarity statement with Mexican waiters! Now stay put while I go get a snack."

Man had sex with a shark.

May we assume it wasn't oral sex?

[la_sonnambula]

Ooh, I like your name, "Eowynnon, Shieldmaiden And Sometime Girl Pirate". Both you and missbingley have such cool names.

GET THE FUCK OUT!! Were they seriously? I totally had no freaking idea.

Yep. The press is rather shy about the subject. Look at how delicately NYT hinted at the other aspect of the Merchant-Ivory partnership:

Mr. Merchant traveled frequently between Europe and an apartment on the East Side of Manhattan, but he and Mr. Ivory centered their life in a 14-room manor house in Claverack, N.Y...

Mr. Ivory survives him, as do four sisters...

And the sad thing is as circumspect as the NYT article is, out of all the articles I've read about Merchant's death, it's the only one that named the survivors.

"No, honey, you are NOT going out to make a solidarity statement with Mexican waiters! Now stay put while I go get a snack."

Heee! He refused to let his civic mindedness be reigned in.

May we assume it wasn't oral sex?Oh, edda, I'm not sure. I don't know anything about shark hoohahs. Also, surrealism doesn't let mere biology

[baggylettuce]

"I know practically nothing about Mr. Merchant. I didn’t know he was sick. I also didn’t know he was gay and that he and James Ivory were partners in every sense of the word."
What the? Colour me extremely ignorant. But then, I can't think of a single Merchant-Ivory production I didn't fall asleep during. (I guess you can also colour me culturally shallow.)

[la_sonnambula]

I thought it was illegal for British subjects to fall asleep while watching Merchant-Ivory movies!