i cant believe he just answered "drugs" to the "drugs or me" question.

(what was easy in the evening by the morning's such a drag ( Read more... )

Im in the grips of an anxiety attack. You'd say we'll keel over and put our heads between our knees to hang there, to deep breathe. right right right (relax relapse). I think if you were tleling me all truths you would say it was six or seven or eight or 100 times youve done it since i asked you not to. I keep thinking about a sentence i read that ( Read more... )

If i had a decent idea what was going on i woudl explain it. BUt i dont. Im not even thinking about love, today. I was thinking about what i should write for my classes. Or pain, you know ( Read more... )

what makes me most angry:

his inability to tell you anything concretely- because he wants to leave his options open for later. So he doesnt have to feel bad about breaking a promise, or disappointing.
he can always say -" i said i wasnt ruling anything out"

(it comes and then it goes. its difficult -to belong toyou.)

(oily marks appear on walls,where pleasure moments hung before the takeover -the sweeping insensitivity,of this still life)

if this is love...oh if this is love. If i was angrier - or sadder - more of anything. Please, more of you


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I hate thinking too much about when it happened...i hate when it just hits , an assault, you know.
and its painful.
I wish it wasnt just rushing - you know. Like i think about how i wanted it to be over so bad. I try and tell myself now it was just for attention. I beg myself to believe this is all for attention. I dont want to recall the ( Read more... )

Its saturday almost, just about there. this is a memoir. Memoirs of a starving girl (everyone here in florida is...starved for your attention). Which is almost everything i need, right? Im trying to remember when it started and when it stopped, and then when it started again ( Read more... )

i keep thinking about being as thin as air ( Read more... )