Look After Your Brother Ch 5

Mar 04, 2005 16:01


Chapter 5 )

bds, layb

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dejectedmadness April 8 2005, 05:59:11 UTC
All Murph got for his trouble was a view of his brother's middle finger as he stalked off without a word. Ma called his name and he went back in to care for her.

This very vividly reminds me of something that my ex boyfriend would do to his twin brother. I am sufficiently creeped out. I sure hope you don't know them. *Shudders.*

Poor Conner, knowing that his brother went through so much worse, that he shouldn't complain. It must be really terrible to know that his suffering couldn't compare.

His tears were hot on his brother's skin.

This sentence was unclear to me. Was Conner or Murphy crying? If it was Conner, the bravado he puts on when he says he is going to do it from now on is less convincing. If it was Murphy... well then I guess it kind of makes sense but I don't know why Murphy would be crying, really.

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xxytwins January 8 2010, 18:48:02 UTC
I think it was Murphy crying. It's slightly unclear, but it makes more sense to me. Also, wouldn't you cry if you knew that a person you love dearly is hurt? You don't need to be a twin to notice the hurt in the eyes of someone close to you, you just can see it. Plus, being twins help.

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ladyjanelly January 8 2010, 22:02:46 UTC
How awesome it is to see this fic is still being read. :)

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dejectedmadness January 10 2010, 18:22:25 UTC
Awesome? When something's good, then it's never forgotten :D

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grackles July 28 2007, 19:34:54 UTC
Holy crap.

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