Take a look at the recent friend request I received at 6:23am. Pay no attention that I'm awake and checking myspace right now ( Read more... )

I visited a doctor yesterday in the hopes that he could cure my ailing back. He actively listened to the whole rigumaroll with the problems I've had, nodding and following everything I said with "OK." He first suggested that I get an MRI at the local hospital because he had never heard of someone having such chronic and constant pain from a ( Read more... )

So I keep having dreams about getting arrested. The first entailed a vial of liquid cocaine, a high-speed chase and four cops wrestling me to the ground. The next was on a New Years Eve and I was arrested for running a stop sign and public intoxication. The jail cell was decorated like an apartment. Alison was arrested later on for tripping on ( Read more... )

No, not venereal disease. I'm talking about one of the most commercialized, hyped-up, bullshit days of the year that is rumored to symbolize love. I have many reasons for despising this so-called "holiday" and will share them with you now ( Read more... )

I love the L word.

My stupid landlord turned off the fucking water to fix a leak and neglected to tell anyone. Now I have no water and I've never been thirstier. And I'm super hungry but all I have to eat is instant oatmeal and you need fucking water for that. Fuck him in his stupid ass. What a dumb Ohio head.

Yeah, so I totally had this bizarre sex dream about an ex boyfriend last night. Came complete with a happy ending and everything. I love dreams like that. Sorry that all I have to talk about is how fucking strange my dreams are. It's really the only new thing that happens ( Read more... )

I am a firm believer that my dreams hold no symbolic meaning. Everything that peeks its head in has a tracable source. Plus, it's a little arrogant to say that dreaming of your teeth falling out means that you're in store for a big change. You could say that about dreaming of dog shit. And who's the expert on dreams anyway? They are way too ( Read more... )

If I had the chance at a righteous gangbang, I'd take all these guys at once.


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You know, when you crack the trays and try your damnedest not to drop any on the floor because it belongs in your cup and one piece falls out anyway. It's the martyr of the bunch. I always put that righteous piece in my cat's water bowl because he gets confused and paws at it for at least 5 minutes ( Read more... )