Fifth night alone, this is my life.
Alone.

At least I have this dog,
and his child to keep me company.
I do not want him to come back sometimes because I know he'll just be drunk and he'll just be a liar like he is every time.

again, i am going to state
there is no use in arguing.
to argue with him, is to beat a dead horse, no matter how much i kick and scream, i am alone and he is gone.

whatever.

'its okay, i dont mind', she lied, there was no use fighting anymore, it exhausted her more than anything, and strength wasn't something she had a lot of anymore after these long eight months. This was the fourth night of solitude and Loneliness slipped his dark face into her home, he watched over her while she, a broken spirit, tucked her tail ( Read more... )

 I am huge ( Read more... )

Thats it, i realize my same mistake,
I keep going back to the same asshole guy.

It's cool. iGOTdis'. 
No, really, i do.
You haven't been there the last four months,
why should i expect anything less?

and you can say i never tried. i gave you a million chances.
please leave me alone, now.

love, nichole

letting go sucks.

when i am sad, i always put songs on repeat. i'll youtube some song that really hits me for whatever instance or drama it best suits and i play it to death. over and over and over. and it feels just as good every time because i really know what it is sayin'. at least to me. sometimes i feel like songs talk real loud to me. maybe i just relate well ( Read more... )

how the hell are you supposed to become closer to someone if you never open up to them when somethings bothering you? dont you know i worry? don't you know i just want to help in whatever way i can. i guess if ignoring all of my outreached hands is whats gonna make you feel better then fine, i can handle it, i'll back off, leave you alone.  i hate ( Read more... )

kyle came over to my house today and we had a baking day, it was a lot of fun. we made crab legs to munch on and we made creme brulee, creme puffs, and some cheesey biscuits. the creme brulee and the creme puffs came out amaaaazing. i'd love to open a bakery, i've always thought i could be happy baking all day. even if it is early hours, it's so so ( Read more... )

Well, you know if it's not one thing, it's always gonna be another. Things between baby daddy and I have been amazing lately... every day is better than the last and we're no longer stressed to our teeth about every little thing. I don't know whats changed or how we are doing this but by the grace of something greater than both of us, we're doing ( Read more... )

i feel like the babies not in me anymore, its weird. i am not hungry all the time like i was before, i dont get sick feeling anymore, my nose isn't on the super fritz.. i don't even pee as much as i did before. is it possible to have a miscarriage through your nose? i had a nose bleed the other day... maybe i just worry too much. i have a doctors ( Read more... )