Well, as I always say, "actions speak louder than words," and a rock in the forehead (or dent in a car if a drive-by ogling) speaks much louder than any words could. Heh heh heh.
no, it's okay if i know you... and you're female... but if i don't know you, and you're male, and we just happen to be in the same parking lot... then it's not okay!!
hahaha I have this bad habit of actually SAYING what i think to those people and asking them if they'd like my fist in their face. or I just give them "Half the peace sign" if ya catch my drift. ;)
Actually, when I was working in Olympia there was a rep who was being a creepy perv for weeks and I walked into our office after shooting some photos and loudly announced "Can I get fired if I tell that asshole to stop staring at my tits??"
Within five minutes, my boss was on the phone with the attorney for hte house of representatives filing a case AND they let me handle the situation however *I* wanted to so I took the option of corning him one day and very privately and politely saying "I'm not sure whether you're aware of it or not but I've noticed you following me aroudn the last few weeks and staring freely at my chest and if you weren't aware that you have been staring at my chest I'm letting you know that I can SEE you doing it and you need to stop or further action will be taken."
it's awesome that you said all that super politely. it's like it makes it even worse when you're not all pissy about it... and what can they do? they can't get mad back, you're not mad (at least, not that they can tell)... it certianly proves who's the bigger person...
and yes, half the peace sign is my default, but often it just doesn't seem to get the point across.
oh, funny story! the one time i actually did say something.. so i was riding my bike, and i happened to be on the sidewalk... well, this latino guy was standing on the corner, and i was unable to alert him that i was coming and almost crashed into him, because he had not moved... so i'm nearly falling over, and he turns around and is like "HELL-OOOOO" in a very "i'm a skanky latino guy hitting on you" way, and i got back on my bike and said "FUCK YOU" and peddled away.
well if nothing else, you can loudly say to them (for others to hear) "As a woman and feminist I do not appreciate you staring at my breasts. I respect you enough to not stare at your penis. Please stop objectifying me. It's rude."
and they'll get all embarrassed. or, if you're short on time, just yell "STOP STARING AT MY BREASTS!"
because it's pretty much common knowledge that saying the word "breast" in any public place makes people VERY uncomfortable and gets everyone's attention.
Oh, and also talking about self-love on public transportation. My friend and I used to take the bus home every day just so he and I could talk about our steamy love lives with ourselves. EVERYONE was listening but no one wanted to admit it. We said the craziest shit just to freak people out... but that's another store entirely. ;)
Take me with you next time you think you might be ogled. I'll be your "muscle" :)
unfortunately in this instance, it was my ass that was recieving the ogling... and i had to do a 180 just to glare at him... oh well. i'll try the "breasts" thing next time.
Never *precisely* that, as I can remember, but similar things. And something about wanting to call down lightning bolts to hit specific portions of the anatomy of offenders...
On the other hand, I haven't had *nearly* as much hassling since getting married; just a few here and there. Except drunks; drunks are an international constant of sexual harassment.
I think the reduction is mostly because method of transport and locations have changed - if one isn't riding Metro or walking along streets with smarmy guys driving by, one just doesn't get hit on nearly as much (as much as I love Metro for other reasons, the creepy guys are a definite minus). But I'm not sure; my demeanor may have changed as well - I've definitely become less observant and aware of the people around me, so that may subtly imply that I'm going to ignore them anyway, potentially discouraging some. Not sure.
infortunately, the dude who inspired this post happened to be in the parking lot were i park for work. sometimes you just can't avoid them. and although i did not yell the aforementioned phrase, i did do a 180 and glare at him when i noticed he was checking out my butt...
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Actually, when I was working in Olympia there was a rep who was being a creepy perv for weeks and I walked into our office after shooting some photos and loudly announced "Can I get fired if I tell that asshole to stop staring at my tits??"
Within five minutes, my boss was on the phone with the attorney for hte house of representatives filing a case AND they let me handle the situation however *I* wanted to so I took the option of corning him one day and very privately and politely saying "I'm not sure whether you're aware of it or not but I've noticed you following me aroudn the last few weeks and staring freely at my chest and if you weren't aware that you have been staring at my chest I'm letting you know that I can SEE you doing it and you need to stop or further action will be taken."
He apologized profusely if I had "somehow ( ... )
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it's awesome that you said all that super politely. it's like it makes it even worse when you're not all pissy about it... and what can they do? they can't get mad back, you're not mad (at least, not that they can tell)... it certianly proves who's the bigger person...
and yes, half the peace sign is my default, but often it just doesn't seem to get the point across.
oh, funny story! the one time i actually did say something.. so i was riding my bike, and i happened to be on the sidewalk... well, this latino guy was standing on the corner, and i was unable to alert him that i was coming and almost crashed into him, because he had not moved... so i'm nearly falling over, and he turns around and is like "HELL-OOOOO" in a very "i'm a skanky latino guy hitting on you" way, and i got back on my bike and said "FUCK YOU" and peddled away.
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and they'll get all embarrassed. or, if you're short on time, just yell "STOP STARING AT MY BREASTS!"
because it's pretty much common knowledge that saying the word "breast" in any public place makes people VERY uncomfortable and gets everyone's attention.
Oh, and also talking about self-love on public transportation. My friend and I used to take the bus home every day just so he and I could talk about our steamy love lives with ourselves. EVERYONE was listening but no one wanted to admit it. We said the craziest shit just to freak people out... but that's another store entirely. ;)
Take me with you next time you think you might be ogled. I'll be your "muscle" :)
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On the other hand, I haven't had *nearly* as much hassling since getting married; just a few here and there. Except drunks; drunks are an international constant of sexual harassment.
I think the reduction is mostly because method of transport and locations have changed - if one isn't riding Metro or walking along streets with smarmy guys driving by, one just doesn't get hit on nearly as much (as much as I love Metro for other reasons, the creepy guys are a definite minus). But I'm not sure; my demeanor may have changed as well - I've definitely become less observant and aware of the people around me, so that may subtly imply that I'm going to ignore them anyway, potentially discouraging some. Not sure.
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