(Untitled)

[lemonpie]

So recently I smashed my car into a pole at burger king because we obviously need poles placed before intercoms it makes a lot of sense and when I try to reverse so I can get closer to the intercom to speak, god throws knives at me from up above and says "haha cretin! you should have never watched that commercial about the new spicy chicken!" and

Comments

[notaliceayres]

Once when I was 16 I got groped by a strange black man in a Burger King who asked me to go to the bathrooms with him. Hey that's a trauma. Teenage trauma. You make me excited. I predicted long ago you would like Jacques, I want it on record that I totally called it.

[lemonpie]

I think I have a child molesting love for Mia in the sense that she is like a young, tender and delicious child that I just want to taste and taste until she grows up to write a tell-all book and tricks me into going on Oprah with her for all the world to see me in my disgusting beastlike ways. I always fall for the "let's get a makeover!" trick.

[akuro742]

if you want to get in sweet with the united negro college fund, i know all the right people