i am moving back to the east coast. to NYC. this is a good thing. i can feel it. and i will be painfully domestic. A one bedroom apartment for two. A cat maybe. Nine to Five. Half a bathroom and lots of warmth. Shopping in thrift stores and target, and maybe ikea to furnish my little hole in the wall ( Read more... )

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i do believe hotmail just deleted my entire email account. i dont know how this is possible but i am very pissed about it. it is the same address and all my contacts are there but the mailbox is cleared and they are treating me like a new customer. the only email there says welcome to MSN. some one needs to die. i hope my Gmail doesnt crap out. ( Read more... )

soon i will actually have a paying job in my field. i know. i can hardly believe it myself. ten bones an hour to record hard core bands. and no limit to the number of hours i can work. well atleast in theory. i know its not that spectacular, but at least its what i want to do. hard core isnt really my style, but i plan to put in the hours, get the ( Read more... )

tonight i used this really expensive cool gizmo to print on blank cds. i threw a quick, yet classic design for my two song demo that i hope to start pimping out soon to coffee shops around here. i feel much more confident about it now, with this spiffy new look. i guess i'll go the whole nine and make a cover too, and put it all in a jewel with my ( Read more... )

or maybe that's just me. is it possible for to me to actually like my life in california. i think its happening. in a strange way, this place seems good for me. part of me feels like im taking the past and reshaping it into something more mangeable. im carving out safety in a place where i used to feel alone. if i can feel proud and safe amongst a ( Read more... )

and screaming, and sarcasm, and anger, and not being allowed to be angry, and seeing red, and not seeing straight, and more anger, and no explanation, and never feeling this way before, and wondering if that stands for something, but mostly just anger.

my parents love jesus more than me ( Read more... )

the world is back in order.

amen.

Maybe i will ditch work on tuesday and go see them at a record store. I'm going to cut my hair kinda short again circa my sophmore year haircut. remember guys, when nikki cut my hair and i had jagged layers and bangs and stuff. like that. i think this could be good. mary. if you read this and would like to escort me to long beach on tuesday evening ( Read more... )