Like most intellectually and emotionally impotent losers, such sudden bouts of ill-temper as I experience are generally provoked by and taken out upon inaminate objects. The other night, I was out walking the dog when my discman decided to down tools just as Bowie was reaching the good bit of Strangers When We Meet. The abject frustration ( Read more... )

<-------- You see that cup there, or just possibly up -------------------------------------------^ there ( Read more... )

Max Clifford, and next to Max Clifford, an accordion player. There was also a mime 50 yards to the west, and Pat Ingoldsby 100 yards to the east.

Is there some International Festival of Annoying Wankers in town that I don't know about?

Interesting to be "in on" a story that dominated the Irish sports media for a period towards the end of last week, namely this Judas prick walking out on us to manage Rovers just as we were about to relegate the Hooped filth.Joe Duffy's Liveline radio phone-in (basically the nation's gossip parlour) devoted last Friday's entire show to the affair. ( Read more... )

I'm retreating from the world for a while, can someone sort my life out while I'm away?

Cheers.

...shouldn't be allowed to place the perfume section at the main entrance. It's essentially a form of low-grade chemical warfare, designed to render patrons insensible and more likely to spend €75 on a shirt upon which they wouldn't piss under normal circumstances ( Read more... )

YOU HAVE: Dry/Frizzy, straight or wavy hair
YOU WANT: Moisturised smooth and shiny healthy hair.

All perfectly true, but no fucking shampoo bottle adopts that peremptory tone with me.

Some of the mannequins in Roches Stores have no faces*, which is rather disturbing ( Read more... )

I stand accused of having a quiff in this picture.

...no matter how innocuous the product or company selling it may be.

It's rather like (I imagine) a girl being chatted up in a bar. It might be momentarily diverting, but at the end of the day, you know they're only after one thing.

On reflection, I could have titled this post Why I don't chat up girls and turned the analogy around.