I hate my you, Dad. A Tomtom? You've got to be kidding me. With that $400 I could have bought new pants I so desperately need since that stomach defect I had for three months. Oh but you wouldn't know about that, would you? Or I could register my car. Or I could get a fucking haircut as I've had split ends for about six months now. Hell with $400 I ( Read more... )

This made me cry ( Read more... )

Oh my God today was amazing. Maddi's parents were out of town so I was able to steal her for the day. We started off by first waking up at six-thirty am. We then moved to Dee's for breakfast. Member, Dallas? Ha. Anyway, then we went to Westminster for an invitation-only prospective student meeting. Maddi and I ditched out on a lot of the tours and ( Read more... )

Things are good. I'm starting to feel a little better. No thanks to anyone. I went in for an endoscopy and my doctor gave me a fucking pregnancy test. But the cameras showed that nothing was wrong. The just showed I was hungry. I could have told them that ( Read more... )

Still sick. Allll the time ( Read more... )

I don't even know where to start ( Read more... )

And what's getting me more than anything is that I was so happy these last few days you know? And no I don't want to exist. I don't want to die. I'm just sick of existance.

I tried. I really did. But it was too hard. It made me sick when he touched me. I couldn't look in his eyes. I cried all night. In public. All night. All night. I'm still crying.

I want to crawl out of my skin.

I haven't been able to eat for a week. I have absolutely no appetite. And every time I do eat, I throw up. And not on purpose. So to fill the void of not eating, I've been drinking a lot of water. Too much apparently. I have a kidney infection. So my doctor gave me antibiotics yesterday afternoon. I'm allergic apparently. So more vomitting of ( Read more... )

Wow. I was thisclose to doing it. Rummaging around the medicine cabinet got me nowhere. I know I have pills in my room that would take care of it. At this point, I can't see anything that's worth this. I always just sort of held out hope that maybe things would shape up and then I'd have a family to look forward to. But if this is what a ( Read more... )