I'll never forget.

Feb 28, 2011 17:29

I am not handling Mosca's loss well.  Not well at all.  I hear her when I'm at home, the sound of her breathing, the sound of her paws padding across the hardwood floors, her little meow when really it's just kids outside, the sound of her mouth opening just before she gives herself a bath, and the sound of her paws hitting the floor as she leaves ( Read more... )

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Comments 14

lijuun March 1 2011, 01:47:53 UTC
All that, and I still managed to forget something. For the first several months after I rescued her, if I'd leave a room while she was sleeping, when she woke up she'd panic. I'd hear her crying and running through the house and I'd call her name and she'd come find me and I could tell she was absolutely panic stricken and so unbelievably relieved to be with me again.

Now I feel like I'm doing that every time I wake, now that she isn't here. I want to run through my house screaming her name until she tells me where she is, so I can find her and fall crying into her fur.

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oldenuf2nb March 1 2011, 03:01:45 UTC
Darling, you're breaking my heart. They take something of us with them, don't they?

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lilia2000 March 1 2011, 04:50:24 UTC
*hugs* I am so so so sorry to hear about the loss of your dear little kitty.

Our neighbors had a cat for years that in many ways was far more mine than theirs. (long story) She was an outdoor cat and one day she didn't come home and days turned into weeks turned into months and the realization she wasn't coming back.

But I cannot tell you how many times I see a shadow move and think it's her, look out at the door mat before stepping to make sure there aren't the remains of her latest prize left there, and on cold days look at the window in the kitchen to see if she's there begging to be let in. That cat had some personality.

So time will make things better, but at the same time you'll never forget her and there will often be things that remind you of her, or you'll look for her even when you know she's gone.

Thanks for sharing the story of your life together. I adore cats and Mosca sounds like one special little kitty. I wish there was more I could say or do... so I send all my best wishes, thoughts and prayers your way. *hugs*

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nenya217 March 1 2011, 05:00:19 UTC
Oh, Lijuun, you just made me cry.

I lost a cat this summer - Raffy, the bowlegged bionic kitty who had to have his shattered leg pieced back together to the tune of $2000. It was worth it. Cat people just understand these things. He was big and blue-eyed and very independent, and was never really MY cat. He preferred my mom, especially after I moved out of the house. But DAMN. When he disappeared this past September, I felt like my heart had been run over by a semi. I STILL have to be very careful not to think of him as I drive up the road to my family's house, or I'll start crying long before I pull in the driveway and notice that he's not there sunning himself.

Cats definitely take a piece of us with them when they go. :( I don't know of any cure for it but time... but I'm sure that when the time is right, you'll find a new and very different kitty to bless your life.

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epol March 1 2011, 06:41:19 UTC
Dude, I totally know. it's a little different, because even when I lost Brownie, I still thankfully had two more at home. But Snoopy and Tidbit are getting awfully gray and creaky and leaky lately. And I look at them, and just can't imagine coming home to that silence. I just don't think I'd want to go, knowing Tidbit wasn't there to follow me up and down the stairs, no matter how much it hurts her little arthritic back, or Snoopy isnt there to drop water on the floor or do her doggy dance every morning when my feet hit the floor. I hate to think of that day ( ... )

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lijuun March 2 2011, 00:38:16 UTC
Now I'm afraid for you! These guys are a part of your life, like all the special animals are. I hadn't realized they were beginning to get gray.

I hope they both live much longer than they should, and that they are relatively healthy and pain-free throughout that time!

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epol March 3 2011, 08:32:48 UTC
My girls are 15 and 14. Tidbit is really creaky, and Snoopy is really leaky. But, that's not too bad at their age. But yeah, I worry about it, too.

I hope it gets easier. It does. But it doesn't. They always have their hold on us, that's what makes them so special.

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