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I'll miss this platform
But I don't think I'm going to keep using it. It's sad, because I've been writing here for such a long time, and blogging for myself is therapeutic, even if I don't share it with anyone else. I'll find another platform, maybe. I have to do something. I might just email myself for a while and see how that goes.
If you're looking for me, I'll be on ( Read more... ) -
Resistance is the secret of joy
The word "gratitude" shares its root with the word for "thanks" in Spanish and Italian (gracias, grazie) and with "grace" in English. In what ways are the graceful dancer and the person who gives thanks, the same? They both know the value of the gifts they have received. To know what you have is to appreciate it, and to appreciate is to enjoy and ( Read more... ) -
So fucking tired of the shock
I'm an American. That is not going to change. I already searched my soul about this in 2000. And again four years later, as my fellow citizens repeated the error. I'm a queer radical who grew up under Reagan. These were terrible years, these presidencies. And sure, we survived them, but is that where we're setting the bar ( Read more... ) -
Tony Soprano's madeleine
I'm rewatching The Sopranos, ten years later, and I identify more strongly with Tony's character, being closer to his age now. He and Carmela reminded me of my parents, the first time I watched this. Dr. Melfi points out that what has triggered Tony's panic attacks, making him pass out, have been associated with meat. He remembers an event from ( Read more... ) -
Walking the dog
It happens slowly, the adustments. I walk him with a very loose grip on the leash, and pull up the slack so it doesn't tangle around his left front paw. When it does, he stops and lifts a foot for me to make the extraction. He can't hold it up for very long, because he's already compensating ( Read more... ) -
Writing is hard
Sometimes it's frustrating to be a writer. Not in a good way, where I'm wondering how to write the thing, make it work. That's the art, the thing I'm in it for. But selling it, finding the right market: that sucker punches me in the ego, all the time. I get all wrapped up in trying to produce the kind of content that x publishes, and it's nothing ( Read more... ) -
Love in the Time of Cholera
I thought I should read this book before writing my own story of love in the time of cholera. As it turns out, they're very different stories. This one had some interesting things to say: on the subject of love, on the devastations of doubt and the passage of time. I was bothered by one of the love affairs, and if affected my willingness to feel ( Read more... ) -
Updates, and cholera
Things I have been doing, and am continuing to do, include posting my dinner each night at The 365 Dinner Project. Tonight I made a stew of venison seasoned with allspice and cinnamon, currants, and pistachios. Last night, we got pizza. It varies, but definitely more toward the venison end of things.
I'm also doing my genealogy stuff. I'm still ( Read more... ) -
A year spent in the past
When this year began, I was several months deep into a self-directed study of the history of slavery and of the Americas. This was my mental anchor while I prepared for and then recovered from back surgery. I began, contemplating writing a historical novel about an early American. At some point, I began adding what I could learn of Sicilian history ( Read more... ) -
On parenting, discipline, trauma, and learning
"As the brain stem and limbic system instinctually tells the child that danger is coming and that he needs to seek safety and security in the embrace of the attachment figure, the limbic system also confronts the reality that the attachment figure is, in fact, the source of danger. Safety and danger conflated. Brain chemistry roundly fucked up ( Read more... )