Comments | lil_amysunshine: And that made it awkward

lil_amysunshine

And that made it awkward

Nov 06, 2005 14:18

I just broke up with Steve, which was awkward since we weren't actually dating. I told him that I didn't want to be friends anymore because all I could see in the future in relation to him was being disregarded and having to constantly hear about the latest stupid and entirely unworthy girl that he's in love with and then hear about how she's ( Read more... )

Comments 13

thatmikeguy November 6 2005, 13:47:58 UTC

wow... that sounds honest and painful :( Sorry to hear it can't work out, but it's good that you could be so direct about it.

That conversation should have had a lot more of him telling you that you were awesome though... sounds like he knows it at least.

Hope it isn't painful for too long.

lil_amysunshine November 7 2005, 15:52:02 UTC

If there had been much more of him telling me how awesome I am, I would have been that much more upset. It's good that I left with the knowledge that he does in fact think I'm awesome, he just doesn't want that kind of relationship from me. He told me I'm awesome, brave, amazing, and truly caring. The mere fact that he won't date me knowing that he's not into it and would leave me even more heart-broken in the long run is actually about the best testament possible to how much he cares about me. But I appreciate the complement. I'm glad to hear that YOU think I'm awesome.

You are my hero. stephanova November 6 2005, 14:49:03 UTC

Speaking from the standpoint of someone who should have had that conversation with someone, but never had the huevos to, I think you are incredibly brave and strong to do what you did today. I know how much strength it has to take to tell someone that you love with all your heart that you need to not be around them anymore and it hurts like all get out. You made the effort to show him, but more importantly yourself, that your happiness is more important than a friendship that ends up being more unfulfilling than rewarding and sometimes that's a hard distinction to see, or want to see. Not only that, but you surmounted the hill of ambiguity that comes with the territory of breaking up with someone you've been not-dating for quite some time.

I, as usual, am very impressed with you and inspired by your actions. And, you are so not a loser for crying about this.

Re: You are my hero. sadiejones November 6 2005, 21:55:16 UTC

big ditto on all of that.

you are so brave to love him so completely for so long, and also for knowing when it is time to let go. and even more- you are feeling it all as a whole and taking it in. it is a huge loss very worthy of mourning. and your feelings are your feelings - you are not a loser!

i hope that it is obvious, but i will state it anyway- i am proud of you and i am 100% here for you if you need to talk, or be distracted by fun things. even if it is 2 AM, call me if you need me or just come over.

aware mackenzie1017 November 7 2005, 07:23:34 UTC

For you to even frame it in the terms that you "broke up with someone you weren't even dating" shows how aware you are of strength of the connection between the two of you- it is something you should be extremely proud of yourself for. That kind of self-awareness is extremely rare; to know how painful something is going to be yet still know that for your own preservation, you need to DO it, this is truly (as steph said) inspirational. For you, the reality IS that you broke up with someone, and even though the feelings were not reciprocated, it was a blow to your emotional welbeing and you have every right to mourn this.

Thanks for being true to yourself, as an example for all of us to follow. In every-day life, this is so easily lost.

And if it helps at all, I'm crying a little for you as well.

Holy Moly stillh20 November 7 2005, 08:41:33 UTC

All I really can say is "wow".... I can't believe that you had the huevos to do that, actually I can believe that. You are a very strong woman and are aware what you need and want. Sometimes it isn't fun to realize these things and most people are too scared to even go there, but as zie said you are rare.

Stop saying you are a loser. Mourn for him as long as you need to. Do what you need to do to let it all out...

I am seriously in awe and not really sure what else to say...

you rock yes_sica November 7 2005, 13:44:34 UTC

remember when you said that he would say "okay" and just walk away?

or that he would say "I'm madly in love with you too." and then you would be lovey dovey?

this is a great middle ground sort of ending. I think. And I am gonna go ahead and ditto the other ladies on being amazed at your strength.

you are truly wonderful, and he just proved it by saying that he did continue to want to know how you are doing.

Re: you rock lil_amysunshine November 7 2005, 15:56:43 UTC

It was a little more than an "Okay" and walking away, but the net effect is the same. I know what he's like. I've seen him be broken up with before. He'll be upset for a few days, but think that my logic was "flawless" and then he'll be fine. Just so long as I don't become best friends with one of his roommates. That would make him jealous. Not enough to say anything to me about it, but jealous nonetheless.

Flawless of course being what they say in Mortal Kombat when you make a really good kill.