I've lost touch with myself. Who am I?

Dear life,

I hate you right now. Everything is wrong and there is nothing I can do to fix it. Why does this always, ALWAYS happen? I'm never happy anymore except when he's here. Then he leaves me in this hellhole because he wants out of it just as bad as I do but he actually has a way out. This is getting really really bad. I'm scared.

Oh it's happening again ( Read more... )

Don't drink. It hurts.

On Sunday my boyfriend and I were driving home from church and I popped in my Spice Girls CD just so I could see him squirm with discomfort. He sang along and knew every word.

This was meant to be.

My birthday is tomorrow.

*sigh*

Things seem to be going well despite the unnecessary feud the other night. But I noticed something a few minutes ago after I got off the phone with him. I don't know if it's something I should be majorly concerned with but it just kind of throws up a red flag for me.

He hardly tells me he loves me anymore.

Sundays always bother me for some reason. I don't know why. I usually enjoy them but something about it bothers me. Hmm...

So some friends drop by to give me my birthday gift since we'll all be really busy soon. It's vital to understand that my boyfriend and I share most of our friends so they all decided to pitch in and buy me something. Which is cool. So I open it up and I see a white tank top. I pull it out of the box and notice there is writing on the other side. ( Read more... )

Well, I almost made it all day. I was having a decent day and right at the end I have to get all stupid and emo. Fuck. Maybe he was right. Maybe I'm not ready for this yet. No, I know I am. Two weeks. Two weeks and I'll be okay again.

But what to do until then?