its so effing hot! and its only april.. im gonna start tanning soon. this summer is looking so much more promising than the last one. *crosses fingers* i dont want to talk about it.. i dont want to jinx it.. but cross your fingers for me.. i'll cross mine that yours is wonderful too. we all need good summers ( Read more... )

yeah, because i didnt spend every waking moment with you guys when i lived there. and the night i started dating evan.. at that party.. did i not spend half the night out in the car with you and sarah and liz? while evan layed on the couch alone? and the only reason i was mad becuase no one had the decency to say "hey marie.. we're too tired to go ( Read more... )

*i'm pseudo stealing this idea from sarah ( Read more... )

today is a bad day.. nothing about it has been right. it makes me sick to think about it. i feel like a shallow cool bath to dull the pain and let slow blood circulation keep me warm. maybe warm water to dull the pain faster. i dont even know me anymore and i dont think i want to.

so today was "that" doctors appt.. the only one i dread all year long.. there's something wildly uncomfortable about wearing only paper clothes and waiting on a table covered in.. paper. Makes me feel somewhat like an old newspaper. But the good news is.. I have 365-ish days to dread it now. Oh well ( Read more... )

ive come to think there are certain things that are meant for specific times in the day.. like.. for some reason skittles always taste better at night.. and specialty cigarretes are sweeter and burn slower after dark.. i can jog easier at 6 am then i ever did at dusk.. mid afternoon rain showers have always been my favorite.. theres something about ( Read more... )

i cant fall in love with you because that will mean i'll spend a life time missing you.. because you're already counting down days till you can leave.. i'm still counting days till the next time i see you.. so please stop asking me that

she used to smile
but thats a tired face now, 
been down for awhile
but believe me dear child
she used to smile
time has left her behind
pushing on, mile after mile
but god, it was heaven 
when she used to smile
her spirit's been broken
and hope's too fragile
i wish you could remember 
when she used to smile
she's been on the outside looking in
left in lonely ( Read more... )

why do i ruin everything? everything.. why cant i just fucking be happy.. i hate him *and i think you all know who i mean* for making me this way. i cant be happy with anyone.. its just not possible anymore... i'm so tired. i'm so sick. im so self destructive.

i miss you.. i miss you.. i miss you..