Comments | lilywhitelilith: Present Progressive

lilywhitelilith

Present Progressive

Jun 14, 2007 00:47

Title: Present Progressive
Author: Telis (theaerosolkid)
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Brendon/Ryan
Summary: Ryan stops writing in online journals because he gets a real one.
Word Count: 10,136
Disclaimer: Fake, fake, fake.
A/N: Thanks to notshybutsly, jocondite, and castoffstarter for the terrific beta help.

For jzbell, happy graduation!

( the past and pending )

brendon/ryan, nc-17

Comments 170

notshybutsly June 14 2007, 08:46:09 UTC

There are so many things that I love about this fic but I think my favorite is your characterization of Brendon. I think it's too easy to just call Brendon the immature one and go with that but you aren't able to play the amount of instruments he can without being smart and I think a lot of writers forget that.

Brendon fucking Ryan's mouth and then the snowballing might be the hottest thing I've ever read. There are things in here that I should find dirtier but I just love the submissiveness of Ryan here. There's a lot of trust in their relationship and I like seeing it in fic.

I will now forever think of Brendon when I wear my starburst bracelet.

This is definitely one of your best.

c0l0rm3mus1c June 15 2007, 02:15:57 UTC

Haha I agree with you! 100%!!

xomarisaxo

theaerosolkid June 17 2007, 08:27:48 UTC

Aaaw, thanks!! Here I am, contributing more fisting porn to a bereft world ;)

theaerosolkid June 17 2007, 08:27:12 UTC

Ahaha, man, thanks so much. I think just knowing that you're going to read it really helps me write, like, in weird ways. You definitely helped me out so much on this one, I'm glad to know that I got the sexy stuff right ;) and um. The characterisations and dialog too. Yep.

♥!!

frequencies June 14 2007, 09:10:59 UTC

I'm not even going to talk about the sex here, because sdjhfjksuhjk. Meaning it's really awesome and perfect and everything, but it's definitely not the best part. I love the characterisations. I love the trust. I love Brendon being a spazzy little freak but being an adult at the same time. They're both thoughtful with each other, and they're in love, and that's kind of my favorite part. The sex has a purpose here, and I like that a lot.

Ryan's insecurities felt so human. And this:

One thing Ryan appreciates: Brendon never reads over his shoulder, like he's caught Spencer trying to do, and he never goes out of his way to let Ryan know that he isn't peeking, which Jon always does. Ryan almost wants to ask Brendon if he wants to read Ryan's journal, but is afraid of the answer - afraid that Brendon will want to and that it'll be. Embarrassing. Because he doesn't want to think about what it'd be like if he were the only one writing about...whatever they're doing. If it's more for him than it is for Brendon ( ... )

theaerosolkid June 17 2007, 08:29:42 UTC

The sex is superneat, I think XD I certainly tried my hardest, ahaha!

Brendon is so much fun for me to write, eeheehee. He is just. So glorious.

jzbell June 14 2007, 09:28:22 UTC

[placeholder comment, real feedback to follow. must sleep, then reread.]

NNNNGH.

THANK YOU OMG.

It kind of feels like Christmas. If my birthday were on Christmas and we were allowed to go trick-or-treating and get lots of free candy to go with the presents.

♥

jzbell June 16 2007, 21:38:27 UTC

AS IF YOU NEED MORE COMMENTS ON THIS ONE ANYWAY, GEEZ. O.o

I think the question might what don't I like about this. Seriously. The details about Ryan's journal, god. I already told you, it makes me miss writing in my real journal. Even when he's writing completely random stuff in his journal, he's conscious of the way it looks on the page, which is so totally in line with the lyrics in the liner notes and everything, the way he uses white space.

And dear god, Brendon listening to classical music just about killed me. I've been thinking about that on and off since, and I just. BRENDON. Of course Ryan feels inadequate when faced with that. *smooshes them*

EEEK, CRAZY SINGER/WRITER DYNAMICS!!! <333

So we hear you boys are fans of brightly coloured sex toys!

\o/

Brendon, despite his goofy exterior is remarkably adept at picking up new things, especially ones that relate to Ryan.So, so true. If he can learn a new instrument just by looking at it, why should Ryan be any different ( ... )

theaerosolkid June 17 2007, 21:34:37 UTC

Okay, dude, thanks for this comment. KIND OF MADE MY DAY.

If he can learn a new instrument just by looking at it, why should Ryan be any different?
YES YES YES RYAN IS JUST ANOTHER INSTRUMENT FOR BRENDON TO MASTER.

Like. The vibrator scene was sort of weird to write since I was so freaking nervous, but also tons of fun, ahaha, and I'm really glad to hear that it pushed your buttons 'n' stuff. I mean. I like that the characterisations worked and everything, but let's face it, man, writing characters comes so much more easily to me than writing sex. That's where all the hard work was! So it's great to hear that I did that well enough to make you happy :D

You're welcome/happy graduation/YAY OTP!!!

softlyforgotten June 14 2007, 11:15:14 UTC

AH MY GOD. SERIOUSLY, TELIS, OH MY GOD.

This is seriously one of your best fics, imo; everything was so perfect, I was literally shaking when I was reading it (although maybe. maybe I should have put a jumper on. um. :/). This just - *takes deep breaths*

Okay. First of all, I have such a journal kink, I love love LOVE the idea of Brendon giving Ryan one and Ryan writing in it about Brendon before and during the relationship and especially him drawing comparisons to Pete & Patrick. Just. Yes, so Ryan, so lovely and perfect. And him being a little bit jealous of Brendon's musical knowledge and then He knows that Brendon could read music before he could even recite his ABC's - just, yes, oh, beautiful.

Also: He doesn't have a specific pen he uses; he'll just grab whatever he can find in a pinch and just go with it, and as a result there are blocks of solid black writing, and then variations of colour and thickness. OH YES THANK YOU. I get so sick of 'special pens' and that kind of thing because if you're going to write you're going to ( ... )

theaerosolkid June 17 2007, 21:37:34 UTC

\o/

Thank you so much!! I seriously -- Jesus. 10 000 words is EPIC for me, dude, so I'm glad it makes some form of sense. I kind of lost track, ahaha.

Man, the caps make my fucking day. <3!!!

eckerlilas June 14 2007, 13:23:03 UTC

OMG. The sex! The CHARACTERIZATION!

The last line wins. Seriously, it WINS.

<3333

*mems*

theaerosolkid June 17 2007, 21:37:52 UTC

Thank you so much!!

Ahaha, Ryanrossy, you sly little thing. :D