Nothing has really changed. Still just work, home, work, distraction, home, work, ad nauseum. Talent is attractive. Moreso than looks, perhaps even personality. Maybe intelligence trumps all of the above, maybe it's dependent upon the type of intelligence, maybe a balance between brains and personality, or maybe these things can't be quantified ( Read more... )

Sitting here listening to music from my phone on shuffle, and reading Bukowski while a dear friend of mine that I will never have no matter how well we fit together speaks to another man she will never have somewhere out of view. Why I do this to myself I have yet to understand. Maybe Bukowski just makes me feel more honestly, as if his ghost won't ( Read more... )

So, my little brother got suspended from school today for sending an email to the principal cussing him out for blocking sites like facebook and deviantart on the school-issued macbooks when they're not at school. To Haden's defense, they're not supposed to be blocked except when they're actually in the school wi-fi network. No big deal, right? ( Read more... )

I kind of held off writing about the trip I took to New York City to see X Japan because my uncle killed himself the morning after I got back, but I think it's long overdue. This isn't going to be terribly entertaining, as I'm basically running through the events as fast as I can. I may repost in a more interesting form later. Consider this an ( Read more... )

She's engaged, because that's how my life works. It also almost totally confirms my hypothesis regarding her faith. Only Christians get married that young around here.

Moving on, I just found out that Bright Eyes is playing in Asheville this Saturday, and tickets are only $25, and it's almost impossible for me to make that show.

That last post was a late-night bawfest, and I apologize. I'm not deleting it, because the emotions were honest. And I am a bit unhappy with my life right now ( Read more... )

I might actually be going insane. Losing my mind has been my absolute biggest fear since I started working in mental health. I've seen people who were previously high-functioning, productive members of society reduced to rambling freaks incapable of putting together a coherent thought. I've listened to their delusional rants. The fantasies in ( Read more... )

So, last week was pretty awesome, aside from going completely broke. I haven't been this poor since last year when my car blew a head gasket ( Read more... )

I hate when I dream about my alarm clock going off and I can't get it to shut off. The reason it won't shut off in the dream is because it is actually going off in real life and I'm still asleep. Fuck dreams ( Read more... )

My overarching mood is starting to revert to a few years ago. Not so much depression as oppressive boredom. Maybe not so much boredom, as I am relatively active, but lonely. I have nobody with whom to share my experiences. Maybe this is a feeling brought on by some ingrown biological 'need' to procreate that I'm translating as simply wanting to ( Read more... )