It has been crazy long since I have used this... my bad.
lots of changes and events have happened.... I probably cant remember most.
The best change has been my beautiful daughter, Cordelia Nevaeh, born Jan 13th @ 1320. 8lbs 7 oz 19 1/2inches long.


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Yesterday when I got into the shower this spider came out of nowhere and tried to suck all of my blood with his little spider mouth ( Read more... )

Guys are freakin idiots! They will miss me when I've turned to the dark side I think.

I let it down and now i'm gettign my feelings stomped on again, maybe not intentaly but stomped on non the less.
god maybe I am one of those emotional women I've heard about.
Well atleast I always have Bob.

My trip was ok. It had its ups and downs... pretty normal ( Read more... )

I have this huge gaping hole in my chest. If its the right thing to do why does it have to hurt so much. I have to have faith- if its ment to be then it will happen... but so far we have had bad timimg, so i stress. I want to be there to help I just dont know if that is a wise idea. Time will tell.

That answers that. the end.

So I guess its not hard to see that I'm not happy... I dont know what happened... one day I'm happy, in love, things are looking like they are sorting themselves out and now ( Read more... )

Force field fully intact- I had a feeling it would happen

I like my boyfriend more then words! Yet I keep him at a distance thinking i am happy having this wall between us, this force field. I dont want to I just feel that in doing this i am protecting him and i both, and I know that is a stupid, i know i am relationship retarted... but i want this to work. Its my second chance, after screwing things up ( Read more... )