I'm so frustrated im not sure where to begin...I don't know weather to cry or punch something...so i did both ( Read more... )

I'm still confused...I talked to chris today about Caleb. He really understood how much I care...and at the same time, how conflicted I am. I'm so confused...did he say all that to make me leave cause he thought it would be best for me...? Or did he really mean all that. *heaves and exasperated sigh ( Read more... )

So here I am in waterloo...the opposite direction from where I had planned to move. I am so confused...I want so much to do what my family and my God expect of me...but my heart is pulling me in another direction. I want so much to have some security in everything I am and everything I believe...but I can't seem to find it. My heart has ached for ( Read more... )

I'm so pissed at my mom, so angry at my self and frustrated with caleb. No one has done anything WRONG persay, but all the things I'm being told are confusing me and making me crazy. I feel like I'm really going to lose it. I almost cut this morning...i didn't but I REALLY WANTED THAT RELEASE. I feel so trapped but I don't know by what or whom. I ( Read more... )

So i went to a women's meeting with my mom for church...usually something like that would make me feel good. But these people know me way to well. They knew I was hiding something and didn't like that I wouldn't tell them. Not like I was tempted tho...they were such nosey busybodies tonight. It's never been that bad before...i almost tols Aleda ( ( Read more... )

...lol, it's actually before 1:00 ( Read more... )

So Caleb and I were out till 5:00 am last night/this morning ( Read more... )

I'm moving away...to london. Caleb said he'd take care of me and somehow I believe him. Even though I can't understand why someone would want to make that kind of a commitment to someone like me. I feel so young, so niave. I don't know what to make of the new direction im headed in. There is SO MUCH I've lost...but I'm gaining aswell. I wish I were ( Read more... )

Dan, if you're reading this you might want to give me a call or an e-mail.
Nicole, I REALLY NEED YOU RIGHT NOW!!! :'(
Spence, I'm so sorry for what I've been putting you through, I'm always here if you need me!!!!!

Im so scared for my life...im scared...can i survive this? can i make it out of this?

Pepper

"Don't say I'm out of touch with this rampant caos, YOUR reality. I know what lies beyond my sleeping refuge...the nightmare I built my own world to escape ( Read more... )