Last I told my mum how I felt about Deirdre.

She didn't believe me and thought it was some weird phase.

Told her again last night. Made sure she understood.

It turned into a screaming match and now she's furious at me. Lana came in and it got even worse. She accused me of thinking things about her. My own sister!! She thinks I'm attracted to a ( Read more... )

I've been fighting with mum alot recently. That's not like us :( I even yelled at Lana for nearly no reason whatsoever. There may have been some very harsh words passing between me and mum and now I'm grounded.

This bites.

Spending time with Deirdre hurts me. It shouldn't be that way. I love being around her but also...it HURTS. Actually hurts. I didn't think it could be a physical pain ( Read more... )

My party was okay, I suppose. There were only a few times when I had to excuse myself from the festivities in the fear I was going to start crying. Deirdre looked so beautiful. Mum was really happy to see her, even if she doesn't know what's going on between us. She just thinks we're best friends like always. She doesn't know it's...complicated.

( Read more... )

MY birthday party was lovely ^_^ Thanks to all of you who came ( Read more... )

Yesterday was my birthday. 18 now. Another year older *smiles* Hopefully wiser too.

And now I just want to curl up and die.

I called dad and explained all that had happened and cried a bit and now I'm alone in my room again.

I think I'm going to go sleep. Possibly for a long time.

I love Renee. I LOVE her. She's....my...*sigh*

And so that's that then.

I hope her Renee lives.

I was an idiot.

My Deirdre has gone far away ( Read more... )

I'm deleriously happy today :D And because of that I'm going to post photos.

( I'm putting them under a lj cut because I'm kind )