Completely isolated in my apartment, as usual.

Alone. The transition to my natural state.

I hate that sliver of time before work, or class, or whatever obligation, where before getting in the car, I wait. Sitting here alone sucks shit.

I LIKE ALCOHOL AGAIN

Hanging out with Stephan more in the past few weeks makes me happy.

After a weekend of lackluster partying, cold feelings, and nonexistent connections I have realized I can give up on expectations. Holding them only breeds frustration. From 25, it seems easy and right to give up.

It's not with sadness I say this. Just real acceptance.

2011 will be good and true.

Despite determining I would dedicate more time to video games this semester, I've been reading "The Rape of Nanking." It compliments my Holocaust in Cinema 527 Hist. class in the atrocity parade, I suppose. Otherwise, I'm incrementally reading a Star Wars fan fiction book, a subject of very poor writing, sadly, and "Transmissions" by Michael Herr. ( Read more... )

We must age. We must bleed. We must die. Everything else is tentative.

So, who wants to bleed?

Oh, and
+I gotta sweet hoodie outta a garbage bag in my parents' garage.
-I can't find my Magic cards. I need my Magic cards!

I think I'm going to quit cigarettes for Lent. Not for religious reasons, just grasping any reason to stop. Actually, I did go to church with my dad last Sunday at 7:30am, but only to check it out after a decade. It was boring.