There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research.

This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

You are on a horse, galloping at a constant speed. On your right side is a sharp drop off, and on your left side is an elephant traveling at the same speed as you. Directly in front of you is a galloping kangaroo and your horse is unable to overtake it. Behind you is a lion running at the same speed as you and the Kangaroo. What must you do to ( Read more... )

...left over from the art auction, of course. One of those oh-so-few perks of being a volunteer...!

He's not drunk he's just acting silly...

Nooo, I'm definitely drunk... :-P

I sailed away to China, in a little row boat to find ya,
and you said you had to get your laundry clean...

Yeah I *wish* that's what I'd dreamed about last night. That would've been amusing. My dreams are usually amusing, but this dream wasn't like that at all. This dream was... disturbing...

There's one part I remember vividly: I woke up, and I ( Read more... )

GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats ( Read more... )

YouTube.com Broadcast Yourself

Tonight was going to be awesome. Yesterday our CIO gave me two suite-level tickets to tonight's Thrashers/Rangers game. I don't care for the Thrashers much but I like the Rangers and I love going to hockey games. The difference between a live hockey game vs. one on TV is kind of like the difference between going to a concert vs. watching MTV. There ( Read more... )

Wow, what an awesome birthday!!! So much great stuff:

* Lots of people at work wishing me happy birthday
(and they didn't trash my office)

* A gift subscription to the Family Handyman
(I could really get in trouble with this one)

* An excellent lunch at Bistro Solterra
(great food!)

* a VMWare Users Group meeting at Andretti's in ( Read more... )

You Are a Seeker Soul
( Read more... )

drip....drip....drip....drip....

That's what I encountered yesterday morning. That steady, monotonous sound.

drip....drip....drip....drip....

I didn't even realize there was a problem until I noticed the cats were acting oddly. They were sitting in a circle, facing inwards, and their heads were all bobbing up & down in unison.

drip....drip.... ( Read more... )