after reading what chas had to say i have to say that i feel pretty useless....cuz he totally has a point...hmm....interesting

I've been thinking about a lot of really big things lately. If you know me well enough you know what i'm talking about. BUt there is one thind that is constantly on my mind. there is a certain guy whos been on my mind a lot, and he's said things to me, that he'd help me with this whole thing. he really means a lot to me, and i wish we could maybe ( Read more... )

SO....going down to Double E, really gave me a chance to stop thinking about Kyle, and just let loose. I got to see some really great people, Kathy, Debbie and Alan. Sadly Robin turned into an asshole and got himself fired. Also, sadly Preston was on vacation, but his half-brother Josh was there. Yeah.....Josh. So last night we just started talking ( Read more... )

So i think this summer might go down as the worst summer i have ever experianced ( Read more... )

Well I quit Chemistry, and now i'm taking some retarded SAT class. Its okay though, its only monday and wednesday. So the otherday i was sitting at Blue Dragon with some people, when Avi came over and was like Hey mal, Florian thinks your really cute. I thought to myself....SWEEEETTT. Then Chris and i decided to be be retarded and switch clothes. ( Read more... )

I have rediscovered this song ( Read more... )

SO uh....today was fucking scary. Okay, well my mom and i went on a trail ride at Tamaya....and my mom's horse spooked and she got buck off...and hit her head on a rock. so shes sitting there fucking bleeding, and i'm like HOLY FUCK, i jumped off my horse and sat with her till the ambulance came. god it was fuckign scary. so i sat at the hospital ( Read more... )

I can handle this. And i am. It seemed horrid at the start, but now, i feel a lot better than i have in quite a while. It was Jay, miraculously, who noticed it...lol It was the first thing he said in a while that actually made sense. He said "You know what Mal....you look...STRONGERRRR THAN YESTERDAY!! No seriously, you look liek youre doing a lot ( Read more... )

Whoopdee doo, i got a job. sadly, i dont think that i get paid minimum wage. $5 an hour, but i dont have to get taxes taken out or any shit like that, so at least i'll have some money in my pocket. Jay and Jeff leave soon, like next week or something. Fuck, that blows, they're moving all the way to fucking Sydney, i truely dont know why. Oh well, i ( Read more... )

Most nights i go to bed crying, thinking about why i did what i did. There were some reasons that made sense but i can't function without him....:( i justdont knowwhat really to do. It makes me sick thinking that i brought this upon myself, but its so true. I know he wont take me back, but, if he reards this, which i doubt he will, i just want him ( Read more... )