-
(Untitled)
back from school. about 3 months now, i went in at a stunning 103lbs and came out fatter then ever. im at 135 and i cant seem to loose it at all. i try not to eat too much, ill eat salads but for some fucking reason my hand wont stay outta my mouth, its all i think about. about how thin i used to be and now how fat and piggish i am. i hate myself, ( Read more... ) -
dissapionted
im fucking disgusting, im at 128lbs.. isude to be 103lbs about 5 months ago. i hate college, thank god im not living on campus anymore. the food kills. i hate myself, i havent ate nething all day so far, not even coffee. im trying not to let myself. i just realized how fat i got. i fucking hate myself, i feel like cutting. see what i reduced myself ( Read more... ) -
so
yea that grl dicked me over but thats okay cause i am the type to take a road trip sooner or later even if i have to wait untill summer break from college to find her. dumb ass as she is obviously gave me her address to mail her the money order...u know i kept that shyt too. ill find her. but so yea, i gained 20 pounds but im going to take this hyt ( Read more... ) -
thinking of alternatives
so this grl who was supposed to mail me those adderalls said she 'accidently' washed the money order in the wash. and if i send in the thing to try to get my money back, itll cost me 15$. im pissed. i needed those. and i dont even know if shell still send em and i can wait till i get my money back to pay her. cause im poor. and i obviously have to ( Read more... ) -
a little pissed but still lovin the college experiance...
god college is great so far, i have been here a week and i already went to like 4 house/frat parties. thing is everyone i hang out with always asks me to go to the caffateria to go and eat with them. i hate it, cause when i go there and try to eat jus a salad or a bowel of cerial i feel like their looking at me. on the second day here i met a grl ( Read more... ) -
tierd
i dont know if anyone actally reads any of these journals religiosly, but today i am tired. i spent 5 hours cleaning the hell outta my room. i gave like 4 bags of clothss and 2 boxs of nick naks to the goodwill cause im moving off to college tomorrow at 7am. its a four hour drive and thats gonna suck. but atleast im dont cleaning and packing, i ( Read more... ) -
(Untitled)
my god, my family realized. my father and cousin both found things that im sure they believe to be disturbing. telling me i have a problem, my father bringing home food constantly and making sure i eat it all. my boyfriend making sure i wont go into the bathroom to throw it up once i have eaten it. i hate this feeling. i feel so fat. im at 108 now ( Read more... ) -
damn it
ok so heres how its going,i jst bought that stuff i was talking about before. its called the 48 hour mirical hollywood diet,im supposed to drik nothing but this stuff for 2 days and of course alot of water,i should start it right now, but im at my cousins house. i slept over last night and to tell the truth i want to be home alone while i do it ( Read more... ) -
(Untitled)
well i got work in like an hour. i started working at WAWA if u know what that is. i work behind the food counter and make people lunch and dinner all day you know like hoagies and shyt. it sux the other day i got so hungry i almost fainted. it really sucked cause i was makeing all that crap and i wanted sum so bad but i cant have it cause i know ( Read more... ) -
aghhhh
i knew it, i was doing good i swear, im working my way to a real fast,i read sumwhere u have to ease ur way in so it doesnt hurt too much, but neway, i only had 3-hard boiled eggs yester day, and that was it, then my brother and his g-friend got me real drunk and sumhow we ended up at a McDonalds, i had the beer munchies real bad and i ended up ( Read more... )