this is becoming a problem.

everynight,
numbing myself with alcohol
so that i can sleep easy.

'cause i really rather not think about these things
piercing my heart.

tonight, i am home.
tonight, i won't sleep.

where is my life headed ( Read more... )

whenever bryan decides to nap during our reading times ( Read more... )

today is august 22nd.

bryan said i looked miserable.

i am, i am.

i'm not sure what to do
or what to think.

not gonna bother deleting that drunk post ( Read more... )

drunk post:
so you know it's honest.

laying here
bryan's house
drunk and high
he's reading a book

i am here wondering listening to
the

new york trio

wondering how i got here

and how i lost the only person that really mattered.

bryan and i talked about my inability to seak
crudely.

i don't think he understands fully

but right now
in the word
he's the ( Read more... )

i like that the old lady from denny's remembers me.
and remembers that i always order coffee.

she even asked if the guys would be joining us.

' not today, hahah '

i asked bryan to meet me at the bookstore after work.

he came.
we walked around for a long while
weaving in and out of aisles
looking at different books

seperating
rejoining
seperating again

i ran into lacey as well

after awhile, he bought 5 books for himself and 1 for me.
the elephant vanishes, haruki murakami

i bought him taco bell
then we went ( Read more... )

i am wondering if i'll ever come to own anything.

i have friends
but i don't own them.

i have someone special
but i don't own him.

i have possessions
but i don't feel that i own them.

not sure what it is
someone like me wants to
own

or what i really consider
' owning ' something

but i'm very sure i do not own anything

not really, at least

i want july to end ( Read more... )