I am updating this to just fill in those who give a crap about whats going on with me. I've decided to get out more and DO things, so I've gone back to working out. I feel so good now that I'm doing it. There is another happy thing, but I'll tell ya when/if you ask me about it. I know that me having an online journal has caused a lot of problems ( Read more... )

I care very deeply for him, he is special to me, and I think he could be my best friend. I lust for him and would love to see him in real time to know where we stand. He (usually) makes me happy. He makes me laugh and makes me want to be a better person. I know I could easily fall in love with him, both as a best friend and/or as a lover. He is ( Read more... )

What I need now is a friend who cares about me. I wish I could be everything to EVERYONE in my life right now, but goddamnit, I can't!!! The hurt is too much!!! *crying* And I wish that eveyone in my life would be HONEST and tell me how they feel about me.....*ha ha ha!!!!yeah, like thats gonna happen!)

For that person who was leaving "annoynmous" messages to me, so that you are more comfortable with what you say to me, I have screened those out of the thread so no one else can see what you wrote to me. I thought that would be a nice thing to do for you. To show you that I care about you and what you say. And I got the email. And I made one reply ( Read more... )

Is it possible to have an absolutely WONDERFUL day and an absolutely HORRIBLE day at the exact same time?? I mean it. I have had some major bad news thrown at me today and yet I still have a smile on my face because of one person. People have come out to prove they aren't who I thought they were, solid "institutions" have fallen without a hint of a ( Read more... )

You didn't leave your name, but I have a feeling I know who you are. And NO, I was NOT talking about you when I put that part about the friends that I said "Fuck you" to. There is a reason why I have not gotten "around" to talking to the 2 of you. There are about 200 started emails and letters that I've ended because I didn't know what to say to ( Read more... )

Not too much going on today. At some point this afternoon, I need to run an errand, but the thought of going outside in 10 degree weather (with my gloves somewhere in Alayna's car) to clear off my truck doesn't seem too appealing. So, I'm procrastinating. My neck and my joints have been hurting a lot, so I'm chilling in bed. Not always a bad thing ( Read more... )

Wow. It has been FOREVER since I wrote in here, so anyone checking in on me is probably wondering where I went. LOL. I just turned 26 on Saturday. I can NOT believe I am that old. *UGH* Still without a job, although Caitlin told me that there is an opening at her job up in Mass. I don't have the money to move out, and I think the commute would kill ( Read more... )

Well, as this is my first entry, I should probably TRY to keep it upbeat, but I can't. My "best" guy friend (who is actually just the guy I've been friends with the longest) is now out of my life. I guess for good. He knows of my current......situation, as I'll put it and has chosen NOT to be the supportive friend I once thought he was. Turns out ( Read more... )